This is the eighty-third issue of The CaT Gazette for all you CUCKS who aren't subscribed (or you normies who just want to browse through back issues).
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I've accomplished pretty much nothing lately in spite of my best efforts. Only thing that's really changed is that my side medication has been switched from Zoloft to Prozac. I doubt it will help but it is what it is.
Nothing of note.
I hate doing this shitty Gazette every week but I hate most things so that's not saying much. What the hell am I even doing anymore. I have a whole goddamn collection of plastic bags from shopping that I use for trash. Kids can kill themselves with those things by accident, so what's stopping me from doing it on purpose? Very very little, I can tell you that much. You get born and grow up thinking "hey all this shit is neato things aren't so bad" and then you hit puberty and depression kicks in and you lose your ability to feel good about shit and suddenly your brain self-destructs.
Your monkey brain is flinging shit around trying to kill the whole system and the reptile brain is down here screeching at it trying to keep shit running via basic "death bad" instincts even though it's a losing battle. Meanwhile, the limbic brain is sitting in the back being completely unhelpful and saying you don't want to make other people feel bad by killing yourself but also saying there's nothing to life that's worth living for and all this shit translates into a complete unironic pit of despair you can't get your ass out of.
To be perfectly frank I've completely forgotten what hope feels like and I'm not sure how it even works anymore. Hope just seems like some bullshit lie you tell yourself to make yourself feel even worse when the rug gets swept out from under you. Why the hell would you do that to yourself? Shit's bad enough as it is. Of course, now you have well-intentioned but ill-informed twats who come in like "you can't lose all hope that's impossible you just gotta ✩ 🎀 𝒷𝑒𝓁𝒾𝑒𝓋𝑒 𝒾𝓃 𝓎🏵𝓊𝓇𝓈𝑒𝓁𝒻 𝓊𝓌𝓊 🎀 ✩" like wow gee thanks asshole I never thought of it like that you've single-handedly restored my serotonin receptors to a functioning state with the power of rainbows and unicorn shits thanks a bunch my dude
I used to think autism was my most debilitating feature but hey ho depression sure proved me wrong on that front. I sometimes forget I even have autism because I'm just so miserable all the time that it doesn't even register. It's just like gee wiz my autism might prevent me from developing and participating in society like a normal human being but my depression does all that and more like a god damn two-in-one deal with an extra bonus serving of suicidal ideation for only $2.99.
I don't know where I'm going with any of this so I'm just going to stop now.
Project Deca Logo
By ChromastoneandTabby
In case you haven't heard yet, I'm currently planning out an anniversary series for BTFF's tenth birthday next year called Project Deca. The series will feature alternate versions of the annual Featured Series from each year, each of which is represented by an Omnitrix symbol in the logo. The last one is blacked out because the 2018 Featured Series of the Year hasn't been decided as of yet.
Nothing of note.