|WARNING: PROFANITY FOLLOWS|
|The following content contains profanity that may not be suitable for readers of all ages. Please proceed with caution.|
|Ben 10: Stupidity Force: End Of Omnivangelion: Future|
|Season 1, Episode 2|
And Then There Were Ben 10: Stupidity Force: End Of Omnivangelion: Future
Family Ben is the second episode of Ben 10: Stupidity Force: End Of Omnivangelion: Future.
The Bens get trapped in a certain TV show.
Gwen Griffynson sat down in front of the piano in the Griffynson home.
(Gwen): It seems today, that all you see, is violence on movies and sex on TV.
Ben, now comically overweight, appeared from the side.
(BenPeter): But where are those good old-fashioned values...
The whole Griffynson family came from both sides, consisting of Gwen, BenPeter, Julie, Cooper, Azmuth, and Eggy.
(The Griffynsons): On which we rely now and then?
The scene changed to a theatre, where the whole cast of Family Ben was dancing.
(All): Lucky there’s a Family Ben!
The Griffynsons began walking up the stairs.
(All): Lucky there’s a Ben who, positively can do, all the things that make us...
(Azmuth): Laugh and cry!
The music ended, as the theme song ended and the episode started on a shot of the Griffynson house. BenPeter, Julie and Cooper were watching TV.
(TV Announcer): And now, E-10: Hood-rizons.
Ethan Wellington was sitting in a decrepit living room on his sofa smoking crack, as Hannibal walked in.
(Hannibal): Hey Ethan, what’s good in the hood?
(Ethan): Not much is “good in the hood”, Hannibal. The hood's poor socio-economic situation stemming from years of systemic racism have kept me stuck in a cycle of poverty where my only escape is hard drugs, which are killing both me and my drive in life. There are no Horizons for me to look forward to in my life, much less the Horizons College of Arts & Culture. (violently coughs) If only I was born to an upper middle-class suburban family...
Suddenly, Alice breaks down the door with a kick and enters the apartment.
(Alice): Ethan where my child support?
(Ethan): Alas, time to perpetuate the vicious cycle by abandoning my kids and leaving them in a toxic environment, where they will invariably fall into drugs and alcohol as a result of peer pressure and their trauma, turning them into crippled drug addicts as well.
Ethan transformed into Ghoulseye, turned intangible, and flew up through the ceiling, abandoning Alice.
(Gwen): BENPEETAH COME DO THE DISHES
(BenPeter): No, Gwen wife, I'm just about to go out and drink with the boys.
(Cooper): But dad you promised to come help with my homework!
(BenPeter): I don't care son, go do something greasy teenage boys do like masturbating.
(Julie): But dad, you said-
BenPeter punched Julie in the face.
(BenPeter): Shut up Julie.
(Eggy): What is this, you’re going to talk down to everyone just because you’re a kid and you want to have fun, and if someone may need a superhero you get the job done?
BenPeter left through the door.
Azmuth, with a much larger head than usual, was just showing Eggy, who now had a full humanoid body, his new invention in his room, a giant metal pod.
(Azmuth): Look, Eggy, I've finally done it! I've finished yet another fantastical invention! Would you like to see how it works?
(Eggy): Thanks Azmuth, but no, I've got to finish my book.
(Azmuth): Ooh, neat! What is it called?
Eggy paused dramatically.
(Eggy): Atheist Birds ARE Real.
(Azmuth): Oh, cool!
(Eggy): Now if you excuse me, Azmuth, I have some liberal thinking to do.
Eggy walked out of Azmuth’s room, who continued to tinker with his invention.
Meanwhile, BenPeter arrived at the bar with the boys, KevinMire, ClevelAland, and JoeRook, who spoke in a deep voice and sat in a wheelchair.
(BenPeter): Hello boys! Time to have a relaxing drink with the boys.
(JoeRook): Ey... uh... BenPeterDude.
(ClevelAland): I’m a minority!
The four sat at the table and ordered some beers.
(BenPeter): Finally, time to relax, away from the nagging wife and children.
(JoeRook): I know what you mean, BenPeterDude. My wife, uh, she has been nagging me to do the, uh, dishes as well.
(BenPeter): I wish I was single like you, KevinMire. Getting married was the worst mistake I did in my life since I went to that Segmentasapien orgy.
The scene segwayed to BenPeter crying naked in a sea of Segmentasapiens constantly changing forms, clutching his feet.
(BenPeter): IT’S ALL LEGOS
BenPeter was sitting on the living room couch as Eggy walked up to him with his book, the words Atheist Birds Are Real on its cover.
(Eggy): Hey BenPeter, I just finished my book, would you like to read it?
(BenPeter): Sure liberal bird dog.
BenPeter picked up the book and started reading the first pages.
(Eggy): What is it, BenPeter?
(BenPeter): I’m just confused, Eggy. What does the first paragraph here mean? We... are stuck in a TV simulation?
BenPeter showed the page to Eggy, which simply contained the phrase “WE ARE STUCK IN A TV SIMULATION” repeated dozens of times across the page.
(Eggy): I think it means we’re stuck in a TV simulation, BenPeter.
BenPeter stroked his chin balls. Suddenly, BenPeter with a taqiyah and BenPeter with sunglasses appeared in the room.
(Muslim BenPeter): What in-
Muslim BenPeter looked around him in confusion, while Crazy BenPeter looked down at his body in complete awe.
(Muslim BenPeter): What?
(Crazy BenPeter): Okay, this is freakin’ epic.
(BenPeter): What? Who are you guys?
(Eggy): BenPeter? Is everything okay?
(Muslim BenPeter): We’re your alters, Abu-Spanner and CBT, snap out of it!
Muslim BenPeter slapped BenPeter, which seemed to wake him up.
(BenPeter): Where the fuck am I? Am I- (looking down) Why am I Peter Griffin? (looking at wrist) Where is my Omnitrix?
(BenPeter): I was gonna do a “bird is the word” bit. What the fuck.
(Crazy BenPeter): That would have been sweet!
(BenPeter): Gwen was- Lois? My wife? What? Why didn’t I question it? That’s... so fucked up...
(Muslim BenPeter): Can we just fast-forward through this? Yes, you’re married to your cousin. Cooper, who we haven’t seen in years is your son, and your ex-girlfriend is your daughter and you punched her in the face. Now can we try to understand how to get your Omnitrix back and get out of here?
(BenPeter): But what does this mean? Is-is this some psychological experiment suggesting that I want to abuse Julie? Or that I want to have sex with- Gwen?
(Muslim BenPeter): It means we need to figure out what’s going on!
(Eggy): Uh, BenPeter? Are you okay?
(BenPeter): Man, I just got so lost up in this world... it felt so real and so comfortable... My marriage with Gwen was so... good...
(Crazy BenPeter): Dude let’s just go and talk to my son Azmuth already let him have his freudian breakdown. Filthy Bwen shipper
(Muslim BenPeter): You’re right CBT. Or should I say, CBPG.
(Crazy BenPeter): Call me-
Crazy BenPeter let down a cold hard stare through his sunglasses.
(Crazy BenPeter): CP.
Muslim BenPeter looked at Crazy BenPeter and sighed.
(Muslim BenPeter): Let’s just go talk to Azmuth.
(Crazy BenPeter): For Cool Peter? Huh?
Muslim BenPeter and Crazy BenPeter dragged BenPeter up the stairs to Azmuth’s room. Eggy remained downstairs.
(Eggy): I am confused.
Eggy ran up the stairs as well, and entered Azmuth’s room, where he found three BenPeters trying to converse with Azmuth. BenPeter was sitting on a chair, trying to think.
(BenPeter): Why would I beat up my daughter like that? Do I still hold some anger against her for our breakup?
(Azmuth): Hrmm. Hrmm.
(Muslim BenPeter): It’s no use, CBPG. All I hear is baby noises.
(Crazy BenPeter): Wait. Eggy, he can talk to Azmuth. Eggy, tell Azmuth we need a freakin’ sweet Omnitrix.
(Eggy): A what? Care to explain all this, BenPeter?
(Muslim BenPeter): It’s a long story, just please?
(Eggy): Fine. Azmuth, BenPeter needs an “Omnitrix”, whatever that is.
(Azmuth): Oh, the fat man wants something from me now, is that right?
(Eggy): I don’t know what’s going on either, do you have an Omnitrix or not?
(Azmuth): Yes. Yes I do.
Azmuth crawled under his bed and pulled out a classic Omnitrix, while BenPeter was brooding in the chair.
(BenPeter): Man... I really need to give Alan a call. I’ve neglected too many good friends over the years...
(Muslim BenPeter): Ben, can you snap out of it?
(BenPeter): Yeah, yeah, sorry. Getting an Omnitrix, got it.
The BenPeters and Eggy looked down at Azmuth, holding the Omnitrix.
(Azmuth): I'll give you this... if you use it to kill Gwen.
(Eggy): I thought you were over that bit. Aren’t you just gay now?
(Azmuth): I can be both, Eggy!
(BenPeter): Aw jeez, this reminds me of that time I DJed at that Appoplexian Bar Mitzvah.
The scene segwayed into BenPeter DJing at an Appoplexian Bar Mitzvah, but was cut abruptly.
(Muslim Ben): No! No segways! Azmuth, just give us the Omnitrix!
Azmuth reluctantly handed over the Omnitrix. Muslim BenPeter attached it to his arm, causing the Omnitrix to instantly appear on all three BenPeter’s arms.
(Muslim Ben): Who do we transform into to get out of here?
(Crazy BenPeter): Wait, first things first!
Crazy BenPeter placed his finger on his Omnitrix, allowing it to scan him. The Omnitrix flashed yellow, as it showed up a hologram of Peter Griffin. Crazy Ben slapped his wrist and transformed.
(Crazy BenPeter/BenPeter): BENPETER!!!
BenPeter was Peter Griffin with an Omnitrix symbol on his chest.
(Muslim BenPeter): Sorry, CBT, but I don’t think BenPeter can actually help us get out of here.
(Crazy BenPeter/BenPeter): Aw.
(BenPeter): We’re in a TV series right? Let’s just use TV.
(Muslim BenPeter): Good idea.
BenPeter transformed into TV, becoming a bipedal TV set on legs.
(BenPeter/TV): Huh. It appears we’re trapped inside-
TV’s screen suddenly went red and he began twitching in place. The hostile entity quickly took over him, and stood up in place, his screen changing to a generic TV show host face. The rest of the room looked at TV, baffled.
(BenPeter/TV): Greetings, Tennysons! It is I, your favorite television host!
The Bens were surrounded by sounds of clapping and woos from thin air.
(Crazy BenPeter/BenPeter): HOW
(Muslim BenPeter): Who are you?
(BenPeter/TV): My name is Sexon! And I am a fellow Televisian, just like the form Ben has just transformed into! You are all currently experiencing a very special customized episode of Family Guy, starrrring you, Ben, CBT, Eggy and perfect cast of replicas of all your friends and family!
The room was suddenly filled with stock cheering, to the character’s confusion.
(Sexon): Smile to the cameras, friends, you’re all on LIVE TV!
The invisible crowd cheered again.
(Muslim BenPeter): Why would you do this, you shaitan?
(Sexon): You see, to understand why I did all this, I should first explain about the upcoming Omnivangelion. A event mentioned in multiple prophecies across millions of years, in almost every alien culture across the universe. If we choose to believe such prophecies, this event could potentially awaken an archaic being so powerful it could unravel the very fabric of the universe itself. And it all starts with you four. The only way to prevent the Omnivangelion is-
BenPeter roundhouse kicked Sexon’s screen face, kicking him to the ground and cracking his screen.
(Crazy BenPeter/BenPeter): SHUT UP
(Sexon): You have angered me, Tennysons! You better learn to stick to your script!
Sexon’s screen began glowing violently red, as he floated into the air. Out of his screen materialized a hand holding a Glock, threatening the group.
(Sexon): How about we all calm down, huh?
(Crazy BenPeter/BenPeter): NO FREAKING WAY!
BenPeter kicked the gun out of Sexon’s hand, allowing Muslim Ben to quickly transform into Upgrade and shoot himself towards Sexon, taking over him.
(BenPeter/TV/Sexon/Muslim BenPeter/Upgrade): AHHHHHHHH
The scenery began changing filters around them, turning from black and white to color to monochrome, as Sexon’s dials spun around in place randomly. The invisible stock crowd kept changing from cheering, to “oooh” sounds, to laughing.
(Crazy BenPeter/BenPeter): Holy crap!
(BenPeter/TV/Sexon/Muslim BenPeter/Upgrade): TAke... EGgY...
BenPeter grabbed Eggy.
(Eggy): What the hell?
Upgrade managed to switch the channel, teleporting all three in a flash of white light.
They all appeared in a small flying-saucer shaped spaceship. Upgrade shot out of TV, who shot out and collided with BenPeter, causing him to drop Eggy, all three reverting to human in the process.
(Muslim Ben): Finally. That probably went on too long.
(Crazy Ben): But we didn't even do the chicken fight...
Muslim Ben looked down and saw himself in a white labcoat. He looked at Crazy Ben, who had the same labcoat and spiky brown hair. His pupils were asterisk shaped.
(Muslim Ben): Where are we, anyway?
The two heard Eggy and Ben talking in the drivers seat. Ben was dressed similar to Crazy and Muslim Ben, with his mouth dripping alcohol, while Eggy had a human body and a yellow shirt.
(Eggy): Aw-aw jeez B-Ben I’m sorry I didn’t burn down that alien orphanage like you asked
(Ben): You’re-burrrrp-a real f*cking disappointment Eggy. I thought I taught you enough about-burrrrrrp-nihilism to tell you that nothing matters in this universe but yourself or your family or some shit-burrrrrrp. You’ve got to-you’ve got to wield this nihilism like a sword, Eggy, just stop giving a shit in gener-rrrrrruup-al-that’s all you have to do, it’s just a bunch of chemicals in your brain Eggy you should realize that and stop letting them contr-rrrrrup-ol you Eggy. Nothing matters it’s all chemicals Eggy. But when nothing matters then you realize how dep-burrp -depressing the universe is Eggy. Nihilism is a double-edged sword Eggy because it makes you realize how pointless everything is and how nothing matterrrrs-urrrp. That’s when the depression comes in-burrrrrrrp-Eggy. I know I said nothing matters and it’s all chemicals Eggy but depression is the only emotion that has scientific basis it’s just pure facts and science and years of experimentation which as we know is the only force that moves the uurrrrniverse Eggy. Eggy, being depressed means you’re sma-urrrt enough to see the universe for what it is. I’m not an asshole Eggy I’m just too smart enough to know that everyone should depressed and cynical and shitty to one another beca-uuse nothing really matters, Eggy. See Eggy you can even-burrp see I’m depressed because at the end of last episode I sat in the garage and made a-burrrrp- sad face next to one of my machines-burrrp, with sad music and all that shit. People re-remixed that shit and made Simpsonswave-style videos Eggy, I made it, I am finally a symbol of depression-burrp on the internet. 14 year old incels finally have someone to look uurrrrrrp to, Eggy.
(Eggy): B-B-B-Ben should we really make fun of our fans? I mean it’s been p-pretty much overdone online...
(Ben): E-eeeeeeeeuuuggy f*ck our fans Eggy, what do we need from them, huh? Love and affection?
(Eggy): N-N-no, Ben, I mean, i-isn’t it kind of overdone? Th-there was that whole copypasta about needing to have a certain amount of IQ to understand R-rick and Morty and all that, and all those Reddit moment memes...
(Ben): Who-uuuuuuuurps- who’s Rick and Morty, Eggy? We’re Ben and Eggy. Ben and Eggy forever a thousand years. Or as I-burrrrp-like to call us, Benjamin and Eggington.
(Eggy): Yeah, yeah, right, we’re Ben and E-eggy...
Crazy and Muslim Ben kept looking at them from the backseat, as Ben and Eggy kept conversing.
(Muslim Ben): When do we interrupt them?
(Crazy Ben): Shhhhh. Wait.
(Ben): So i-in conclusion Eggy, whenever something like that happ-uuuurpens all you need to think to yourself is “wubba lubba dub dub”.
(Crazy Ben): Ah, finally, a phrase I can repeat in every Reddit comment section.
Through the spaceship’s windows, they could see they were approaching Earth.
(Muslim Ben): You’re right, anyway. We should probably wait until we land.
The spaceship landed on Earth near Ben’s garage. Ben and Eggy stepped out of the spaceship, followed by the two Ben alters, as Ben took a swig from his flask. They entered the garage.
(Eggy): B-Bye Ben, I’m gonna think about what you said.
(Ben): G-Good, Eggy, I know you-uuure a smart kid.
Eggy left the garage, and Muslim Ben touched Ben on the shoulder. Ben turned around to face him.
(Muslim Ben): Hey. Ben. Snap out of it.
Muslim Ben shaked Ben, and snapped his fingers in front of him. Ben jolted and reactively drew out and pointed his blaster.
(Ben): Who the f*ck are you? Are you from the Citadel?
(Muslim Ben): Ben, it’s me, Abu-Spanner. We’re still stuck in that TV simulation.
Ben realized who he was, and put his blaster back in his lab coat.
(Ben): Oh, yeah, right. Why am I an alcoholic now?
(Muslim Ben): Because you’re depressed, I think? I haven’t really been paying attention. I tend to do that around overt haram acts.
(Ben): Sure, I guess. Okay, time to get out of here.
Ben looked down at his wrist, and again noticed the absence of his Omnitrix.
Ben pulled out his portal gun, and shot out a green portal into the air. He pulled out an Omnitrix, and placed it on his wrist, as, yet again, Omnitrixes appeared on all three of the Bens wrists. Ben inspected his portal gun.
(Muslim Ben): Alright, can we leave?
Ben thought about it for a bit.
(Ben): Wait. I gotta know who’s who in this dimension. (yelling) EGGY!
Eggy came down through the door.
(Eggy): Y-yeah grandpa Ben?
(Ben): Oh no, I’ve been attacked by a, uh, demon, that makes me forget all my friends and family’s names. What’s your sisters name, Eggy?
(Eggy): T-That’s Gwen, Ben. She’s a f*cking bitch.
(Ben): Well, I can live with that I guess. A lot less cousincesty.
(Ben): Never mind that, who’s Jerry? I-I mean, your dad?
(Muslim Ben): Ben...
(Eggy): Th-that would be JeRook, Ben.
(Ben): Hah, I knew it. He’s such a Jerry.
(Muslim Ben): Ben, how about we go? We don’t know how much time we have left.
(Ben): Jeez, give me a few minutes here, okay? I gotta figure out who my daughter is in this one at least.
Suddenly, from behind them, they saw a green Omnitrix flash. All three looked back, towards the lab table.
(Crazy Ben/Q-cumber): I turned myself into a pickle, Eggy! I’m pickle Beeeeeen!
(Ben): Yeah, we’re fucking leaving.
(Muslim Ben): That’s-that’s a cucumber, CBT.
(Eggy): W-What? G-Grandpa Ben?
(Crazy Ben/Q-cumber): Oh, sorry. (slaps Omnitrix symbol) Ultimate Q-cumber! I’m pickle Beeeeen!!!! Is this not the funniest shit you’ve ever seen?
(Ben): No, CBT, the post-ironic version of this meme is dead too.
(Crazy Ben/Ultimate Q-cumber): Aw. Well, we can leave now, Ben. I'm out of Rick and Morty references.
Ben was ready to transform, before a voice boomed on them through the ceiling.
(Sexon): Wait, don’t you guys want to know about Omnivangelion? What it all means?
(Ben): No, not really. I want to go home.
(Sexon): Come on guys. What could trigger this cataclysmic event? What will be the fate of the three Ben personalities? What kind of monster will be summoned from the dark abyss of the Omniverse?
(Ben): I mean, we’ll probably just figure it out if it does end up happening so... no, still no.
(Sexon): I promise if you’ll end up staying you’ll find out everything!
Ben readied his Omnitrix slap again.
(Sexon): Wait, wait, wait. Fine. Fine. The Omnivangelion isn’t real, okay? I came up with that shit for ratings. I’m actually here on behalf of cable TV. Streaming completely destroyed us, man. For your good old memories as a kid watching cable TV with your family, please, consider staying on for a few more minutes, to encourage other people continue with this great tradition.
(Ben): What? No! I don’t give a shit about cable!
(Sexon): I could give you a permanent home here, Ben! Just imagine, living forever in your favorite fictional world, being friends and chilling with your favorite characters from TV. You could be a wizard, a Jedi, a super-hero, whatever you’d like!
(Ben): No, man. I just want to go back home.
(Sexon): Ugh, okay, fine. Let’s try another show then.
(Ben): No way!
Ben was just about to slap his Omnitrix, before Sexon suddenly materialized in front of him,shooting out power cuffs locking Ben’s wrists to the wall behind him. Muslim Ben rushed to assist him, but was kicked to the ground as well.
(Muslim Ben): CBT! Help!
(Crazy Ben/Ultimate Q-cumber): Pickle time!
Ultimate Q-cumber fired off pickles at Sexon, who materialized a spear from his screen and shot it out at Ult. Q-cumber, spearing him to the wall.
(Crazy Ben/Ultimate Q-cumber): No more... Pickle Ben...
Sexon hovered in place, his screen face glowing white. After a few seconds, he changed the channel once again.
Ben, Crazy Ben, Muslim Ben, and Eggy reappeared in the desert. Ben was now aging, with a grey hair and a grey beard. He wore a yellow shirt with some gloves, and across his hands were green Wildvine vines.
Crazy Ben was dressed in a black leather jacket, with a black cap on his head which seemed to merge with his hair. Behind him stood Math, floating in an odd purple aura.
Muslim Ben, dressed in a red robe, had a large golden chain hanging from his neck, and a white hairband around his now spiky hair. Behind him hovered Heatblast.
Eggy was back to his normal form this time, however behind him floated Cheesewheel, shaped like a rodent, with two back wheels.
Noticing what world they were in, Crazy Ben smiled wide. Ben realized as well, from Crazy Ben's reaction.
(Ben): Oh no, no, no. Fuck no. No. No, I am not doing this.
Ben looked down at his arm, and noticed he had an Omnitrix for once, to his relief.
(Crazy Ben): But Ben-
(Ben): CBT, we are NOT doing JoJo references. No fucking way. You shut your damn mouth.
(Crazy Ben): Yare-
(Ben): NO. No. Do not say another word. We are OUT of here.
Ben looked down at his wrist and noticed he still had his Omnitrix. Selecting an alien, Ben angrily pushed down the face of his watch, transforming into Dimensional. Dimensional quickly ripped open a portal beneath them and teleported all four outside of the TV.
The four reappeared in a TV studio, next to Sexon, who recoiled backwards as he saw the group teleport in. Ben reverted from Dimensional, and kicked Sexon in the shin, causing him to fall on his side.
(Sexon): Ben, wait-
Ben drop-kicked Sexon’s screen, beginning to crack it, and continued kicking him while he was down.
(Ben): POP (kick) CULTURE (kick) REFERENCES (kick) ARE THE LOWEST (kick) FORM (kick) OF HUMOR!
In anger, Ben’s final punt smashed Sexon’s screen. Ben calmed himself as he shook off the glass from his shoe, before spitting on Sexon. His two alters stared in shock and confusion.
(Ben): I fucking hate cable.
- Ben Tennyson
- Eggy Griffynson
- Eggy Smith
- Gwen Griffynson
- Julie Griffynson
- Cooper Griffynson
- Azmuth Griffynson
- Levin KevinMire
- ClevelAland AllBrown
- JoeRook Blonkson
- JerRook Smith
- Wildvine/Wildvine Purple (cameo, as Stand)
- Math/Math Platinum (cameo, as Stand)
- Heatblast/Pyronite's Red (cameo, as Stand)
- Cheesewheel/The Cheeseool (cameo, as Stand)
- Ethan Wellington (cameo)
- Hannibal Lincoln (cameo)
- Alice Lucinda (cameo)
- Ghoulseye (cameo)
By Crazy Ben
By Muslim Ben