Whom the Bell Tolls: Part 1

Episode
[Open to a nighttime scene taking place on the outskirts of a small town in the forest. A man is running as fast as he can from an unseen force, his panicked breathing indicating that this is a life-or-death situation. After a few moments, the man trips on rock sticking out of the dirt, falling to the ground.]

[Panicked Man]: “No...no, no, no, no!”

Before he could get up, what appeared to be a dark phantom of some kind reached him, standing over him with an ominous air around it. He tried as hard as could to avoid looking at it, but was eventually overcome by an unnaturally strong urge to see what had been chasing him all this way. He slowly turned his head towards the creature, and as soon as his eyes became visible to it, it lunged at him faster than than the eye could see.

He didn’t even have time to scream.

[Cut to the inside of a warehouse in the main city’s industrial district. Almost every member of the Zodiac Organization is gathered there, including two not previously introduced. Orion is pacing in front of the group, clearly waiting for something. After a few moments, Ophiuchus rushes into the room, holding a small stack of papers.]

[Ophiuchus]: “Apologies for the wait, sir, but the printer was malfunctioning again.”

[Orion]: “Understandable. Please proceed with the report.”

[Ophiuchus]: “Well, most of it is taxes and bills, but, uh, there is one thing in particular that may prove to be a bit of an...obstacle to our plans.”

[Orion]: “If you could get to point, please.”

[Ophiuchus]: “Right, uh, sorry, the thing is, we’ve been receiving reports from our more underground workers that the local Plumbers have formed a temporary, uh, Plumber Team, of sorts.”

[Orion]: “The transformation matrix wielder and the nanobot manipulator, I know.”

[Ophiuchus]: “Well, uh, not exactly. A full-fledged team. It, uh, appears to consist of the aforementioned nanobot manipulator, a man in a black cloak with unknown abilities, a highly-experienced Grikonian mercenary, a Human/Feuer hybrid, and the semi-celebrity F3.

[Orion]: “...I see.”

Orion’s eyes narrowed behind his mask, creating an atmosphere of intimidating coldness. There was an awkward silence for a few moments, as the present operatives breathlessly waited for his next words.

[Orion]: “...If this is how it’s going to be, then fine, we’ll play their game. Ophiuchus, call in our last two team members.”

Ophiuchus flinched in surprise at this order, giving Orion a wide-eyed stare.

[Ophiuchus]: “B-but sir, didn’t you want them as far away from our vital operations as possible?”

[Orion]: “Yes, but now things have changed. We’re entering the endgame soon, and I will use whatever resources I find necessary to achieve our goal.”

[Ophiuchus]: “I...I understand, sir. I’ll contact them right away.”

Ophiuchus left the room, scuttling past the other operatives as quickly as he could.

[Orion]: “That is all for now. The rest of you are free to go.”

The rest of the operatives dispersed, save for Scorpio, who stood in the center of the room with his arms folded, and Aquarius, who was waiting for him near the door.

[Orion]: “Is there something you need to discuss, Scorpio?”

[Scorpio]: “Don’t play dumb. You know exactly what issues I have with this.”

[Orion]: “I suspect I do, but please, elaborate.”

[Scorpio]: “You’re calling two of the most uncontrollable, volatile people on Earth into a heavily-populated area because you feel a bit threatened? I’m only here because you promised money with no murder-themed complications, and then you come in with this bullcrap plan? If you seriously think this is a good idea, you’re not just a coward, you’re dumb as hell!”

[Orion]: “If you’re quite done with your insipid argument, I would just like to point out that you’re free to leave the organization at any time if you disagree with my policies. Of course, I doubt that you’d-”

[Scorpio]: “Alright, I’m leaving.”

Scorpio turned and began walking towards the warehouse door.

[Orion]: “Excuse me?”

[Scorpio]: (Ignoring Orion) “See ya, Aquarius. I’m done with this bull.”

As Scorpio passed by Aquarius, she grabbed onto his shoulder, causing him to pause and turn to look at her.

[Aquarius]: “Hold on a second. You’re actually leaving?”

[Scorpio]: (Rolls his eyes) “The hell do you think? I’ve put up with way too much crap from this stupid organization already.”

[Aquarius]: “...I see.”

Scorpio turned back to the door and left the building, slamming said door behind him. There were a few moments of awkward silence.

[Orion]: “I suppose we’ll have to find you a new partner, then.”

[Cut to Aeron emerging from a portal into what appears to be a small Germanic town in the middle of a forest. Clockwork swiftly follows, and closes the portal behind them. The two are soaking wet, with Aeron’s clothing being completely bogged down with water.]

[Aeron]: (Angrily) “Okay, you wanna tell me why you thought transporting us to a timeline where everything is flooded was a good idea?”

[Clockwork]: “It was hilarious.”

Aeron gave him a harsh glare.

[Clockwork]: “Well, for me, at any rate.”

[Aeron]: “Oh, for the love of...look, just tell me where we are now.”

[Clockwork]: “I think this is Dimension...I don’t know, 35? We’re on one of the timelines branching out from it.”

[Aeron]: (Raises eyebrow) “I thought the different numbered Dimensions were the branching timelines.”

[Clockwork]: “Pfft, you kidding? That would be even harder to keep track of. Each Dimension assigned a whole number is just a primary branch of the original timeline. Each branching timeline has its own set of branching timelines that branch out from them, with timelines that branch out from those timelines, and so on and so forth.”

[Aeron]: “I’m gonna pretend I care about what you just said, and specify my question: where on Earth are we?”

[Clockwork]: “Germany, I think. Look like we’re somewhere in the Black Forest.”

[Aeron]: “Well, that’s just great. I can’t speak German!”

[Clockwork]: “Didn’t you replace Roundabout’s DNA Card with a Universal Translator module?”

[Aeron]: “Oh, right. Never figured out how that stupid alien was supposed to work, anyways.”

[Clockwork]: (Rolls eyes) “Of course you didn’t.”

[Aeron]: “Shut it. Let’s just try and situate ourselves.”

[Clockwork]: (Gestures behind Aeron) “Maybe that bell tower would be a good place to start.”

Aeron turned around to see a large crowd of people gathered around a large bell tower in the distance. Many of them were carrying flowers or ribbons of some kind. It appeared as if they were patiently waiting to ascend the stairs inside the tower to the bell.

[Aeron]: “What the hell’s going on over there?”

[Clockwork]: “Some kind of ceremony, if I had to guess. Are we going to check it out?”

[Aeron]: “Once everyone clears out. I’m not a big fan of crowds unless I’m mowing them down with a grenade launcher.”

[Clockwork]: “That was an odd day.”

[Aeron] “That was a god damn awesome day and you know it.”

Aeron turned to walk towards the forest, but froze in place upon seeing what had been to their right throughout their entire conversation.

[Aeron]: “Uh, Clockwork? Did I kill someone here already without remembering it?”

[Clockwork]: “What? No. Why would you-”

Clockwork turned to see where Aeron was looking, and paused mid-sentence. A man’s dead body laid near the edge of the forest, and it appeared as if his eyes had been gouged out.

[Clockwork]: “That is...somewhat unsettling.”

[Aeron]: “Oh, don’t be such a baby. I just wanna know if someone’s trying to stake a claim on my turf.”

[Clockwork]: “We just got here. Wouldn’t it be the other way around?”

[Aeron]: “Nobody asked you.”

[Clockwork]: (Sighs) “Well, what are you going to do about this?”

[Aeron]: “I think you mean what are you going to do about this.”

[Clockwork]: “Excuse me?”

[Aeron]: (Smirks) “I’ve got an idea.”

[Cut to the inside of Plumber Base UT1, where Alpha and Xr. Nullamor are standing at the main computer console, with Theo waiting nearby impatiently.]

[Theo]: “About how long do you think this’ll take?”

[Xr. Nullamor]: “Not sure, but it would probably be going faster if someone’s computer systems didn’t have completely idiotic security standards!”

[Alpha]: “I’m not the one who designed this operating system! If it were up to me, we’d scrap the whole thing and start over from scratch!”

Alpha pressed a few keys on the console, only to be met by what had to have been the twentieth error message this morning.

[Alpha]: (Yelling at the computer) “Stop locking me out because I need Administrator access! I AM THE ADMINISTRATOR! I AM USING THE ADMINISTRATOR ACCOUNT! I OWN YOU! JUST WORK ALREADY!”

[Theo]: (To Nullamor) “Holy crap. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Alpha this pissed.”

[Xr. Nullamor]: (Shaking his head) “The year 2040, and Earth still doesn’t have a halfway decent operating system.”

[Theo]: “I thought the Plumber’s OS was created on a different planet.”

[Xr. Nullamor]: “Yes, it was. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s on Earth now and it still sucks.”

Alpha suddenly kicked the computer console out of frustration. As soon as she did so, the error message disappeared.

[Xr. Nullamor]: “See? Sometimes all you need is a little percussive maintenance.”

[Alpha]: (Sighs) “Alright, with that fixed, the install should only take a few moments here.”

[Xr. Nullamor]: (Turns to Theo) “Oh, don’t forget to turn on the Star Driver Gauntlet’s Universal Translator. That way you won’t have to worry about understanding anyone you meet in other timelines.”

[Theo]: (Rolls his eyes) “Don’t worry about it, I’ll remember.”

After a few moments, the Star Driver Gauntlet’s touchscreen blinked at let out a small beeping sound.

[Xr. Nullamor]: “Sounds like the install went alright. The Star Driver Gauntlet is now connected to the base’s computer system, so we’ll be able to stream data from the tracker to its compass system, as well as contact each you whenever necessary.”

[Theo]: “Alright, so that means I’m good to go?”

[Alpha]: “Correct. Now we simply need to send you to the timeline the tracker is pointing to.”

[Theo]: “Sweet. How do we do that?”

There were a few moments of awkward silence.

[Xr. Nullamor]: “You know, with the benefit of hindsight-”

[Alpha]: “Well, this is already off to an amazing start.”

[Theo]: (Thinking) “Hm...hold on, I think I might have an idea.”

Theo pulled up the StarTrix and transformed into Final Countdown. He closed his eyes and meditated for a few moments. The StarTrix symbol began blinking, and changed to display the compass function.

[Xr. Nullamor]: “Hm. That’s unexpected.”

[Theo/Final Countdown]: “I’m still not entirely sure how this works, but I think the nanobots give me some sort of mental connection to the StarTrix. I should be able to use that to travel to the timeline Aeron’s in.”

[Xr. Nullamor]: “That seems almost egregiously convenient.”

[Alpha]: “That’s good news. You should be all set to leave, then. Good luck.”

Final Countdown nodded in response and stepped forward, disappearing into a violet portal. Alpha turned back to face the computer console, but noticed that Xr. Nullamor was still staring after Theo with a puzzled expression.

[Alpha]: “Is something wrong?”

[Xr. Nullamor]: “...I’m not sure, but I do not trust those nanomachines.”

[Cut to a war-torn zone in a desert environment. Wrecked, crumbling ruins surround two people, a man and a woman, who are sitting down on some rubble. The man is wearing an armored bodysuit with several guns mounted on the back and multiple ammo cartridges stored in various pouches. The woman is wearing black armor with gold detailing and a mask slightly resembling a skull.]

[Man]: “It would appear as if Orion wants us back on the front lines.”

[Woman]: (Scoffs) “After the fit he threw last time, I’m surprised he’d make that decision again.”

[Man]: “Perhaps we could avoid destroying the entire payload in the crossfire this time.”

[Woman]: “I make no promises.”

[Man]: (Sighs) “Of course you don’t.”

The two of them got up and began walking through the war zone. As the woman passed by various buildings, the ones on her left seemed to implode, while the ones on her right exploded. The man swiftly drew out a pistol and shot it into the air, with the bullet somehow seeking out every piece of debris flying at them and striking it in a manner that deflected it away from them. Once all the pieces of debris had been destroyed, the bullet returned to the man, situating itself in one of his ammo pouches.

[Man]: “Stop showing off.”

[Woman]: (Smirks) “And what do you call what you just did there?”

[Man]: “Conservative use of ammunition.”

[Woman]: (Laughs) “Whatever you say.”

[Cut to Final Countdown stepping out of a portal into a forest composed mostly of pine trees, with the occasional oak here and there. The air is clear and brisk, and a slight breeze blows through the area with a bit of a nip to it. Final Countdown transforms back into Theo, who pulls up the Star Driver Gauntlet and presses ‘Select’, bringing up a list of extra features. He presses a button that reads ‘Compass’, bringing up a small interface with a red arrow pointing to the south.]

[Theo]: “Time to see if this Tracker thing really works.”

He began walking through the forest towards the direction the arrow had pointed him in. After a few minutes of walking, he stumbled over something sticking out of the ground. Upon further examination, the object in the ground appeared to be a metal stick of some kind. Though there wasn’t much of an explanation to be seen for the metal being there, Theo simply shrugged it off and kept walking.

As he walked, he slowly began to hear an odd ringing in his ears. His mind seemed to fall under some sort of haze, with little being clear to him except the fact that he was still walking. After a while of being stuck in this trance, his walking path was interrupted by him tripping over something again, snapping him back to attention. Looking back to see what had tripped him, he found that it was the same metal stick as before.

[Theo]: “The hell? I thought I was moving in a straight line. So why...”

Theo trailed off as his head began to feel foggy again. He smacked himself to avoid falling back into the trance-like state, and walked over to the metal stick, attempting to pull it out of the ground to see what is was. After a few good tries, the stick finally came loose, erupting out of the ground to reveal that it was the bayonet of a rifle that it remained attached to.

Attached to the end of the rifle was a decomposing arm.

Theo tossed away the morbid discovery in surprise, swiftly looking around himself for any immediate threats. Finding nothing, he checked the compass again, finding that the red arrow was still pointing in the same direction.

[Theo]: “Alright, something’s definitely up with this forest. Let’s try something different.”

He pulled up the StarTrix and scrolled through the alien list, selecting an alien and transforming into Rough Diamond. He attempted to fly up through the forest’s canopy, but as soon as he rose into the clear sky, an incredibly painful, high-pitched ringing hit his ears. The shock sent him tumbling back to the ground, where he transformed into Magidisk.

[Rough Diamond/Magidisk]: “Alright, I guess I’m gonna walk. But first...”

Magidisk swiped the claws on his left arm across his own head, creating an Aspect Disc. As soon as he did so, everything went completely silent, and the fog that had slowly been creeping back into his head vanished. Satisfied with having removed his own ability to hear, he stored the Aspect Disc in the record player on his chest, albeit without activating it.

He began walking south again, continuing his trek through the forest.

[Cut to Aeron walking into the forest town’s bell tower. A stationed guard attempts to stop him, but Aeron simply summons Clockwork and stops time, stabbing the guard in the back and moving on. He eventually climbs up to the top of the tower, where an old gold and silver bells hangs mysteriously in the air.]

[Aeron]: “Alright Clockwork, let it go.”

Clockwork allowed time to resume, then dispersed. An agonized yell could be heard from downstairs as the guard’s injury took effect.

[Aeron]: (Turns towards the stairwell) “Whoops, guess it wasn’t deep enough to kill him. Eh, screw it.” (Turns back to face the bell) “Now, let’s see what’s so special about this thing.”

Aeron walked around the bell, carefully looking it over. It seemed to have an odd, swooped shape and an armored appearance, but nothing else immediately stood out about it.

[Aeron]: “Huh.” (Scratches his head) “I wonder why everyone respects this thing so much. Some sorta tradition, maybe?”

Aeron knocked on the bell, attempting to see what it sounded like. Suddenly, what seemed to be a large, teal eye flashed open on the bell and stared down at Aeron, who recoiled in surprise.

[Aeron]: “Uh...hi?”

The next thing the townspeople heard was a large “GONG” sound, which was swiftly followed by Aeron being thrown off the bell tower by a massive sound wave. He hit the ground with a large “thud”, letting out a grunt of pain as he made impact.

[Aeron]: “Oh for the love of...Clockwork!”

Clockwork emerged from the InverTrix, staring down at Aeron with an impressed expression.

[Clockwork]: “Wow. Less than half a minute and you already got your ass kicked by a bell.”

[Aeron]: “Just shut up and heal me, dammit!”

Clockwork reversed Aeron’s injuries, after which he pulled himself up off the ground.

[Clockwork]: “I think it’s safe to say that idea backfired.”

[Aeron]: “What? No, that wasn’t my idea. That was just a detour.”

[Clockwork]: “...Are you kidding me right now?”

[Aeron]: “Shut it. Okay, look, here’s the actual idea...”

[Cut to the inside of Plumber Base UT1. Alpha is stationed at the main computer, observing the monitor intently, as the temporary Plumber team Nova assembled is mostly slouching around.]

[F3]: “...Okay, is anyone else feeling kinda bored?”

[Pyros]: “Ya kiddin’? ‘Course we are. Dunno what to do ‘bout it, though.”

[Herc]: “We could spend some time in the training room. We hardly know anything about each other’s fighting styles or how they mesh.”

[F3]: (Poutily) “Well, my fighting style mostly consists of getting my own sleep dust blown back in my face.”

[Reaper]: “Why not just charge up a large ball of the stuff before throwing it around willy-nilly? That way, the wind won’t blow it back in your face.”

F3’s eyes widened in amazement as he considered this simple change in tactics.

[F3]: (Excitedly) “Oh. My. God. You just changed everything! Where do you get such wisdom from?!”

[Reaper]: “I have a few thousand years of experience up my sleeves.”

[Nova]: “Woah, that long? So you’re not human?”

[Reaper]: “Oh, no, I am. It’s just...well, it’s a long story, to be frank.”

Nova opened her mouth to ask another question, but was interrupted by the warning alarm suddenly going off. Alpha pulled up video footage of the alarm’s location, displaying the cloaked woman and armored man from before terrorizing part of the city, destroying everything in their path.

[Alpha]: “Looks like you’re not going to be bored for much longer. Suit up and get moving!”

[Cut back to the forest town, where Aeron is impatiently pacing at the edge of the woods. Phantom Lord watches him from nearby with a bored expression.]

[Phantom Lord]: “So, run this over with me run more time.”

[Aeron]: “For the last time, we go into town center and you possess some people. Get into their heads, see what they know. Once we’ve got answers, we go ahead and take out whatever’s infringing on my new turf. Got that?”

[Phantom Lord]: “...Yeah, nope, hearing it again doesn’t make it any less dumb.”

[Aeron]: “How is it dumb?!”

[Phantom Lord]: “What makes you think random people out and about in broad daylight are going to know anything about this mess?”

[Aeron]: “Do you have any better ideas?”

[Phantom Lord]: “...Not really.”

[Aeron]: “Then let’s just go already!”

Aeron began walking away in a huff, with Phantom Lord trailing behind.

[Cut to a relatively populated area of the city. Buildings are crumbling left and right, with the man and woman from earlier using their abilities to tear things down. After a few moments of this, a ball of purple energy shoots towards them, striking the man in the back and sending him stumbling forward a few feet. The man and woman turn to find Nova’s team staring them down.]

[Woman]: “Well, look who finally decided to show up.”

[Man]: “Do you have any idea how long we’ve been destroying things to get your attention?”

[Herc]: “What do you mean ‘get our attention’? You’re saying you expected us to show up?”

[Man]: “Correct.”

[Woman]: “Apparently, our employer doesn’t appreciate having a Plumber team in his city, so he sent us to take care of you.”

[Pyros]: “His city?”

[Nova]: “Wait a second. Two-person team consisting of whom I presume to be alien hybrids, working for a boss that doesn’t do anything himself. Lemme guess, Zodiac Organization?”

[Man]: “Correct. I am Sagittarius.”

[Woman]: “And I’m Libra.”

[F3]: “Woah, you guys are hybrids too? What kind of powers do you have?”

[Libra]: “Guess.”

Libra raised her arms to face to nearby buildings. One building collapsed in on itself, whereas the other exploded in a shower of debris. Before anyone else could react, Herc suddenly split his arms into multiple limbs and grabbed the rest of team, throwing them behind him as he transformed one of his arms into a laser cannon.

[Pyros]: “Hey, what was that for?!”

[F3]: “Yeah, it just looks like she has telekinesis. No big deal.”

[Herc]: “That’s not telekinesis. I’ve seen this kind of ability before, and trust me, you do not want to be in her range.”

[Libra]: (Laughs) “What’s wrong, mercenary? Scared?”

[Herc]: “Oh, please. You don’t know the definition of that word until the idiot teenager you’re working with calls the leader of a race of extremely dangerous energy beings a ‘little shit’. I’m just not big on the idea of dying horribly at the moment.”

[Nova]: “What?”

[Herc]: “Long story.”

Libra began walking towards the group, prompting them to begin backing away.

[Reaper]: “Alright, so, assuming we were to enter her range by some unfortunate means. What would happen?”

[Herc]: “She must’ve been fused with the DNA of a Staterran. The have the ability to control the balance of any given system.”

[Pyros]: “Which means...?”

[Herc]: “Well, for example, when she destroyed those buildings, all she had to do was change their pressurization. She presumably transferred all of the pressurization of the imploded building to the exploded building, like shifting weights on a scale.”

[F3]: “I did not understand any of that.”

[Herc]: “She can implode something to explode you.”

[F3]: “Oh, crap!”

A bullet suddenly whizzed past the group, who looked towards Sagittarius, who was putting away the pistol he had fired.

[Nova]: “Man, that guy gives up quick.”

[Herc]: “I doubt it. Everybody keep an eye out for-”

Herc was interrupted by the clanging of metal behind him. He turned to look for a moment, finding that Reaper had taken out his scythe and was currently using it to deflect the bullet that had missed them moments ago, which was currently moving erratically through the air with the same speed as if it had just been fired. Reaper’s scythe was the only thing keeping it at bay, as he moved it through the air at unnatural speeds.

[Herc]: “You’ve gotta be kidding me.”

Reaper deflected the bullet once again, sending it flying an impressive distance away. As it began to turn around in the air, Reaper stopped moving, beginning what appeared to be some sort of breathing exercise.

[Pyros]: “Yo, uh, this is a really bad time for a nap, man!”

Reaper seemed not to have heard this, giving no response but to focus on his breathing. The bullet recovered its trajectory and began shooting towards the team again, heading directly for Reaper’s head. Mere milliseconds before it made contact, Reaper’s scythe suddenly began glowing with a white energy. He swung the scythe in front of the bullet again, but instead of being deflected, the bullet was instead melted and evaporated as soon as it made contact with the scythe, disappearing in flash of light and steam.

[Reaper]: “Apologies for taking so long. I’m still not very good at using my light energy beyond clumsily shooting it in large beams.”

[Nova]: “Since when can you shoot light energy?!”

[Reaper]: “Again, long story. At least I was able to get rid of the immediate threat.”

[Herc]: “Uh, I wouldn’t pat yourself on the back quite yet if I were you.”

Reaper turned to look at Sagittarius, who was dismounting what appeared to be a hand-held machine gun.

[Reaper]: “That is...unfortunate.”

[Cut to the center of the forest town, where Aeron is covertly leaning on one of the buildings as Phantom Lord moves from person to person in the area, quickly scanning their minds before moving on. After a few moments, Phantom Lord exits the final person and drifts over to Aeron.]

[Phantom Lord]: “Well, there’s nothing exact, but I did get a majority of people noting that odd things have been happening at an abandoned store near the edge of town.”

[Aeron]: (Shrugs and begins walking away from the town center, with Phantom Lord following) “Eh, good enough. Let’s see what we can get from th-”

Aeron was interrupted by a barrage of diamond shards suddenly flying past his head and lodging in the building behind him. He swiftly turned to find a Petrosapien wearing a blue uniform that consisted of a crop top and pants pointing dramatically at him from across the area. The townspeople had paused their current activities to look towards the unusual spectacle.

[???]: “AERON!”

[Aeron]: “Ben Tennyson?!”

[???]: “You’re going-wait, what?” (Pauses for a moment) “God dammit! Even my alternate counterpart is confusing me for Tennyson now?!”

[Aeron]: “Wait, Theo?!” (Pauses) “I’m not sure if that’s better or worse.”

[Theo/???]: “Does Tennyson hold a deadly grudge against you?”

[Aeron]: “...No.”

[???]: “Then probably worse!”

Theo’s Petrosapien transformation lunged towards Aeron, who swiftly ran out into the crowd, recalling Phantom Lord into the InverTrix.

[Aeron]: (Mockingly) “Why do you even have Diamondhead, anyways? Running out of ideas?”

[???]: “For the record, I call this one Diamond Eyes, and actually, this was Nullamor’s idea!”

Diamond eyes raised his right arm towards Aeron, preparing to fire.

[Aeron]: (Taunting) “Oh please, I’m in the middle of a crowd. You wouldn’t shoot at innocent people, would you?”

[Diamond Eyes]: “Nope.”

Diamond Eyes punched the ground with his left fist, creating a pillar of crystal that barreled through the area and snagged Aeron by his hoodie. The surrounding crowd panicked and scattered, as Diamond Eyes launched another barrage of crystal shards towards Aeron, who managed to unsnag himself and swiftly duck out of the way.

[Aeron]: “Ha! You missed!”

[Diamond Eyes]: “Oh, but did I?”

Aeron’s eyes widened as he whipped around to check if Diamond Eyes had pulled off a trick shot of some kind, only to be punched in the back of the head by a diamond fist, the impact of which sent him flying forward a few meters before hitting the ground.

[Diamond Eyes]: “For the record, the answer to that question was yes, I did miss. Made you look, though.”

[Aeron]: “Gah! You are really pissing me off!”

[Diamond Eyes]: “The feeling’s mutual, believe me!”

Aeron pulled up the InverTrix and summoned Deathrock, who charged towards Diamond Eyes with his right fist balled up for a punch. Diamond Eyes reacted by doing the same, the two eventually meeting and throwing their punches, which ended up countering each other perfectly.

[Diamond Eyes]: “Huh, this guy’s as powerful as Rolling Stone? No wonder I see Tennyson using him so much on the news.”

[Deathrock]: “Yes, Petrosapiens are fairly powerful. Unfortunately, they have a very crucial weakness I believe you may have overlooked.”

[Diamond Eyes]: “Oh, really? And what would that be?”

[Deathrock]: (Narrows his eyes) “Crystals don’t mix well with sound waves.”

Deathrock jumped backwards and threw his arms towards Diamond Eyes, generating an ear-piercing barrage of sound waves that began shattering his crystalline form. Diamond Eyes yelled in pain and reached for the StarTrix symbol, transforming into a tall, red and white humanoid alien with pink hearts on his chest and legs. The new alien had a somewhat ambiguously feminine appearance, prompting odd looks from Aeron and Deathrock.

[Diamond Eyes/???]: (Looking himself over) “...Okay, this is a new one.”

[Aeron]: (Laughs) “What’s that thing’s power? Looking so dumb that nobody tries to attack it because of how confused they are?”

[???]: “For the record, this ‘thing’ is called...hm...how about...’Feel Good Inc.’? Yeah, that sounds about right.”

[Aeron]: “...Remind me why we keep naming our aliens after music again?”

[Feel Good Inc.]: (Shrugs) “It just sounds cool, I guess.”

[Deathrock]: “It really doesn’t.”

[FGI and Aeron, in unison]: “Nobody asked you!”

[Deathrock]: “I AM you. Well, half of one of you, anyway.”

[Aeron]: (Waves him off) “Details.”

[Feel Good Inc.]: “Now, to answer your question about this thing’s powers, why don’t you...punch yourself in the face?”

[Aeron]: “The hell are you talking about? I’m not gonna-”

Aeron was interrupted by Deathrock punching him in the face, sending him flying backwards a couple feet as he hit the ground.

[Feel Good Inc.]: “Hey, it even works with loopholes! Nice!”

[Aeron]: (Scrambling to his feet) “Hey, what the hell, man?!”

[Deathrock]: (Shrugs) “I’m not sure. I just suddenly had an overwhelming urge to punch you in the face. More of an urge than usual, I mean.”

[Aeron]: (Turns to face FGI, who is posing smugly) “Alright, what the hell did you do?!”

{Narrator}: ''“Desire Manipulation, the Ptuis Volo’s primary ability! It allows them to manipulate the desires of any target! Only those with an iron will beyond that of any mortal man are immune to its power!”''

Aeron looked up at the sky with a confused expression.

[Aeron]: “Who the hell was that?”

[Deathrock]: “Who was what now?”

[Aeron]: “You mean you didn’t-” (Sighs in frustration) “You know what, screw it, never mind.”

[Feel Good Inc.]: “Alright, enough talking! Let’s get busy!”

Deathrock raised a questioning index finger and opened his mouth to point something out.

[Feel Good Inc.]: “Fighting, ass hat.”

[Deathrock]: “Yeah.”

FGI lunged forward and slid past Deathrock, who was unable to move fast enough to land a hit. He quickly jumped up in the air and roundhouse-kicked Deathrock in the back of the neck, sending him stumbling forward. While he was distracted, FGI jumped over to Aeron and stabbed him with the sharp end of his right index finger.

[Aeron]: (Stumbles back) “Ow! I swear to god, I’m going to...uh...going to...”

Aeron began stumbling around woozily, his limbs starting to go numb as a euphoric haze slowly settled over him.

[Aeron]: “You...did...did you just...inject me with...morphine?”

[Feel Good Inc.]: (Shrugs) “Not sure what it is, actually.”

Aeron’s eyes rolled back into his head as he collapsed to the ground, unconscious. FGI moved in to grab him, but was interrupted by a sonic punch from Deathrock that sent him flying into a nearby building.

[Deathrock]: “Not today, kid.”

Deathrock grabbed Aeron’s left arm and fiddled with the InverTrix, using it to transform himself into Phantom Lord, who scooped up Aeron’s unconscious body and phased into the ground with it. FGI groaned and slowly pulled himself to his feet, hitting the StarTrix symbol and reverting back to Theo.

[FGI/Theo]: (Grumbling) “Note to self: do not forget about the super-strong rock man standing right behind you in the future.”

Theo turned around, noticing the crowd staring at him, having evidently watched the whole fight.

[Theo]: “Uh...hi?”

[Random Villager]: “Heilig verdammte Scheiße, bist du ein so verdammte Gestrüpp lord!”

[Theo]: “...God dammit.”

[Cut back to Nova’s team defending against Libra and Sagittarius. Libra is swiftly approaching the group as Nova is using a dome-shaped shield construct to protect them from Sagittarius’s constant rain of bullets.]

[Nova]: “I don’t know how much longer I can keep this shield up! Do you guys have any ideas?”

[F3]: “Are you kidding? I barely even know what’s going on!”

After a few moments of silence, Reaper reached inside his cloak and pulled out two ornately-decorated black orbs.

[Reaper]: “I was hoping this wouldn’t be necessary, but it would appear as if we’re cornered.”

[Pyros]: “The hell’re ya talking about?! If you have a trump card up your sleeves, jus’ use it already!”

[Reaper]: “Alright. Nova, as soon as I throw these, drop part of the shield to let them through. This is going to get pretty messy!”

[F3]: “Uh, what’s in those things, exactly?”

[Reaper]: “No time to explain! Drop the shield!”

Reaper threw the two orbs, prompting Nova to dissipate part of the shield construct. He deflected the currently incoming bullets with his scythe as the orbs hit the ground outside, creating a metallic pinging sound upon impact. They almost immediately activated, lighting up and creating large, swirling portals of light.

Two large creatures stepped out of the portals, which almost immediately closed behind them. Said creatures stood on their hind legs and had long, lanky arms ending in large, misshapen claws. There seemed to be no visible skin or muscle tissue around their heads, exposing their skulls, which held ominously glowing red dots instead of eyes.

[Pyros]: “What in the ever-lovin’ hell are those?!”

[Reaper]: “Death Hounds. Xr. Nullamor provided me with the technology to summon them at will.”

[F3]: “Death Hounds? They don’t look like dogs at all!”

[Reaper]: “From what I understand, their base DNA before Nullamor tampered with it was that of a black-backed jackal.”

[F3]: “Man, try saying that three times fast!”

[Nova]: “How the hell do you go from a jackal to that?!”

[Reaper]: (Shrugs) “I’m not entirely sure.”

Libra and Sagittarius looked at the Death Hounds for a few moments before bursting out into laughter.

[Libra]: “I’m sorry, was this really the best trick you had up your sleeve?”

[Sagittarius]: “What makes you think we can’t just tear through these creatures like everything else?”

[Reaper]: “You’re certainly welcome to try.”

Sagittarius raised his pistol and fired off several shots towards the creatures. The bullets bounced off their skin harmlessly, doing little more than agitating them further.

[Libra]: (Shoves Sagittarius out of the way) “Tch, let someone with real destructive power handle this.”

Libra threw her arms up, attempting to use her abilities to destroy the Death Hounds.

Nothing happened.

The Death Hounds began advancing, hissing and growling with murderous intent. Sagittarius desperately fired off another round of shots with a rifle, but to no avail.

[Libra]: “Wh-what the hell?! What is the meaning of this?!”

[Reaper]: “Death Hounds only have one weakness; specifically, being eaten. Since I doubt either of you are capable of doing that, I would recommend you surrender before things get out of hand.”

[Herc]: “Excuse me, did you say their one weakness was...being eaten?”

[Reaper]: “Yes. They’re partially demonic, so it’s something of a symbolic measure, if I remember correctly.”

[Herc]: “Just...why?”

[Reaper]: “Would you think to defeat something specifically by eating it?”

[Herc]: “Well, no.”

[Reaper]: “There you go.”

The Death Hounds launched themselves at Libra and Sagittarius with blood-curdling roars. Before they could so much as raise an arm in defense, the creatures were already tearing at them, leaving large gashes in their armor.

[Nova]: “Uh, Reaper? You think you might wanna recall those things before they rip those two apart?”

[Reaper]: “As soon as I recall them, Libra and Sagittarius are liable to begin attacking again. We need to find some way to incapacitate them first.”

[F3]: “...Hey, I think I can handle that!”

The rest of the team stepped away from F3 in one smooth motion.

[F3]: “What? Was it something I said?”

[Pyros]: “No offense, man, but like, whenever you use your powers, they kinda-”

[Herc]: “Backfire like crazy.”

[F3]: “Well, okay, you guys have any other ideas?”

There were a couple moments of silence.

[F3]: “Alright, then I’m taking the shot!”

F3 turned back to face Libra and Sagittarius, but instead of throwing his arms forward and launching a thin stream of sleep dust as usual, he put his hands together and began coalescing the sleep dust into a large ball.

[Reaper]: “Huh. Didn’t think he’d actually remember to do that.”

F3 leaned back, winding up as if he were throwing a baseball, and pitched the ball of sleep dust towards Libra, Sagittarius, and the Death Hounds. It managed to hit Sagittarius dead-on, exploding into a cloud of dust. Within seconds, the two clashing parties collapsed onto the ground, unconscious.

[F3]: “Wow, I can’t believe that worked!”

[Herc]: “Neither can I.”

Reaper picked up the two summoning orbs off the ground and pressed a small button on each, creating portals of light that enveloped the Death Hounds before disappearing, taking the creatures with them.

[Nova]: “Great work, team! Now, let’s get these two back to headquarters.”

Nova turned to look towards Libra and Sagittarius, but found nothing but empty air.

[Nova]: “What the-hey, did any of you see where they went?!”

[Herc]: “They just disappeared out of nowhere!”

[Nova]: (Huffs) “Well, that’s just dandy.”

[Cut to the warehouse from the beginning of the episode. Libra and Sagittarius are standing in front of Orion, who has a very annoyed expression beneath his mask.]

[Orion]: “You two were taken out by a couple of overgrown dogs and one of the most incompetent celebrity ‘superheroes’ of all time. If Ophiuchus didn’t have the ability to teleport you back here, you would’ve been captured. Would you care to explain this?”

[Libra]: “With all due respect, sir, those ‘overgrown dogs’ were, quite literally, invulnerable, carnivorous demons. Of course, if you think you could fight them, I’d be more than willing to see you try.”

[Orion]: “And how did it escalate to the point where the cloaked man could summon these creatures? Why didn’t you exterminate their group immediately?”

[Sagittarius]: “We underestimated them. We didn’t think we needed to-”

[Orion]: “Exactly. You didn’t think. I expect you to do so from now on.”

Libra’s face took on an expression of barely contained rage at this point, something that did not go unnoticed by Orion.

[Orion]: “You may go for now. I will contact you when I have need of you.”

Libra stormed out of the building, swiftly followed by Sagittarius, who exited the premises a bit more carefully. After a few moments, Ophiuchus turned to Orion.

[Ophiuchus]: “You appear to be drawing quite a bit of ire from our operatives lately.”

[Orion]: “I don’t need them to like me. I simply need them to obey me.”

[Ophiuchus]: “Well, yes, but have you ever considered that those two concepts may work in tandem a bit more than you think?”

[Orion]: “...I did not ask for your advice.”

Orion walked towards the back of the warehouse, leaving behind a somewhat miffed Ophiuchus.

[Cut to Aeron rifling through the basement of an old, abandoned store at the edge of the town. Black Hole Sun is standing next to him, using the spotlight in its head to illuminate the area.]

[Black Hole Sun]: “What do you really expect to find down here?”

[Aeron]: “Answers, moron. I’m not the creepiest thing in town at the moment, and that really pisses me off.”

[Black Hole Sun]: “And your plan to handle this is...?”

[Aeron]: “Figure out what’s been terrorizing the townsfolk, kick its ass, and then start terrorizing the townsfolk.”

[Black Hole Sun]: (Rolls eyes) “Wow, what a great plan.”

[Aeron]: “Screw off.”

After a few more minutes of searching, Aeron eventually grabbed hold of what seemed to be a small wooden box. Pulling it free from the cluttered mess of goods surrounding it, he held it up to examine it, observing that its exterior was well-kept and free from dust, as opposed to pretty much everything else in the basement.

Turning it over in his hands, he noted that it had hinges and a small key sticking out of its back. He opened it up, revealing to be a music box of some kind. A few old notes were folded and stored away in it, and a small figure with black-painted indentations instead of eyes stood in the middle of a rotating platform.

[Black Hole Sun]: “What is all that?”

[Aeron]: (Smirks) “I think I might’ve just found we’re looking for.”

[Cut to Theo walking into the town’s bell tower and spotting the guard Aeron had stabbed earlier. He rushes over to him and summons Season as a Projection Transformation, healing his wound. After a few moments, the guard slowly wakes up, prompting Theo to recall Season.]

[Guard]: (Groggily) “What...what happened?”

[Theo]: “I don’t know, I just found you like this. Do you remember anything?”

[Guard]: “I’m not sure. One moment, I was trying to stop a man with a very peculiar appearance from entering the tower, and the next, the man was gone, and I had a wound in my back.”

[Theo]: (Eyes narrow) “Aeron...”

[Guard]: “Say, who are you? What are you doing here?”

[Theo]: “Call me Theo. There was a bit of a...scuffle in the town center, and people started saying something about the bell in this tower for some reason, so I came to investigate.”

[Guard]: “I see. Unfortunately, I’m afraid I’m not allowed to let you through at the moment. Tribute is over.”

[Theo]: “What’s ‘Tribute’?”

[Guard]: (Laughs) “What’s Tribute? You can’t be serious.”

[Theo]: “Uh...why not?”

[Guard]: “Everyone in town knows what Tribute is, and nobody new ever enters the village, thanks to our guardian bell.”

[Theo]: “Guardian...bell?”

[Guard]: “Did you hit your head on a rock or something? This shouldn’t be news to ya.”

Theo was about to reply, but was interrupted by a soft ringing emanating from the top of the tower. The guard stared up into the tower in shock.

[Theo]: “What’s going on?”

[Guard]: “It seems as if the bell...wishes to see you.”

[Theo]: “...The bell?”

[Guard]: “Yes, the bell! Quickly now, you don’t want to keep it waiting!”

The guard shoved Theo to the stairwell, prompting him to start climbing. As he reached the top of the stairs, he saw the large bell hovering motionlessly in place. After a few moments of nothing happening, the bell suddenly started moving, and turned to face Theo, opening its large, teal eye.

[Theo]: “...Well, this is definitely not what I was expecting.”

[Bell]: “I’d be more surprised if you had expected it.”

The bell spoke with a calm, deep voice that felt oddly soothing to the ears, something which surprised Theo further.

[Bell]: “I imagine you’d like an explanation for all this.”

[Theo]: “That would be nice, yes.”

The bell tipped slightly as if it was nodding.

[Bell]: “To begin with, I am not truly a ‘bell’, as you humans call it. I am-”

[Theo]: “An alien?”

[Bell]: (Surprised) “How did you know?”

[Theo]: (Raises StarTrix) “I have some experience with them.”

[Bell]: “I see. I am a Metacho from the world of Exrantios. I am an older member of my species, and I desired to find a relatively quiet planet to live on, devoid of intergalactic incidents. I did not initially intend to come to Earth, but about a century ago, I decided to visit it on a whim. I landed in the forest near this small village, and grew a certain fondness for these townspeople, deciding to stay and watch over them as their protector.”

The Metacho paused for a moment before continuing, clearly becoming somewhat distraught.

[Metacho]: “Unfortunately, I am far too old now to protect them as I wish, and all I am truly capable of is staving off people from entering the village using my powers, frail as they may be.”

[Theo]: “Why do you want to stop people from entering the village?”

[Metacho]: “Normally, I would be happy to allow people in, but communal with your planet’s spirits has revealed to me that the outside world is in a great and terrible war. I fear if that war were to come to my village, I would not be able to stop it.”

[Theo]: “A war? What year is it?”

[Metacho]: “I’m afraid I can only approximate that it seems to be the early twentieth century, in human terms. Beyond that, I’m not sure.”

[Theo]: “...Okay. So, why did you want to see me?”

[Metacho]: “Because, there is a threat to the village that I am unable to fight. A threat that comes from within.”

[Theo]: “What do you mean?”

[Metacho]: “There is a dark presence here, one that bears malice towards these innocent people.”

[Theo]: “Yeah, and his name’s Aeron.”

[Metacho]: “No. I know of your counterpart, but it appears as if you are already pursuing him. i speak of a demonic spirit, one that was unleashed by a foolish man that believed he would control it.”

[Theo]: “...Well, I’ve heard weirder things. What do you want me to do?”

[Metacho]: “For now, simply follow your counterpart, as he appears to be on the right path to finding the spirit. Do not attempt to apprehend him until the spirit has been dealt with.”

[Theo]: “Are you serious? Who knows how many people he could kill before then?!”

[Metacho]: “He seems rather dedicated to his current task, it would seem. He should be relatively harmless for the moment.”

[Theo]: (Sighs) “Alright, fine. I just have one last question.”

[Metacho]: “Which would be?”

[Theo]: “Would you object to a quick scan?”

[Cut to nighttime in the village. Aeron is walking through the center of the village again, this time looking over the box he had found in the basement. Black Hole Sun hovered behind him with a rather annoyed expression.]

[Black Hole Sun]: “This is a dumb plan. This is such a dumb plan.”

[Aeron]: “I didn’t ask for your opinion.”

[Black Hole Sun]: “And I didn’t ask for you to be stupid, but look where we are right now.”

[Aeron]: “Whatever. Just keep an eye out while I wind up this music box.”

[Black Hole Sun]: “You have literally stated that you believe that running the damn thing will unleash whatever did that to the person we found earlier. Why would you want to do this?”

[Aeron]: “So we can kill it.”

[Black Hole Sun]: “How are we supposed to kill a supernatural entity?!”

[Aeron]: “We kill a lot of things. We’ll figure it out.”

Before Black Hole Sun could protest any further, Aeron closed his eyes and wound up the music box, then opened it. As a haunting melody drifted from the music box, a dark phantom suddenly appeared in front of him, staring down at him with a cold, dead gaze.

[Aeron]: “Is it there?”

[Black Hole Sun]: “Yes, and it doesn’t look particularly friendly.”

[Aeron]: “Don’t worry. According to those notes, this thing really has a penchant for not being looked at for whatever reason, so as long as I keep them closed, I’ll be fine.”

[Black Hole Sun]: “Uh, what about-”

Black Hole Sun was suddenly cut off by a rush of wind and the shattering of glass and metal.

[Aeron]: “Whoops. I probably should’ve explained this to him earlier.”

Black Hole Sun’s body disappeared in a burst of red energy, leaving Aeron to face the phantom alone.

[Aeron]: “Alright buddy, you and I need to have a little chit-chat.”

The phantom slowly hovered towards Aeron, circling him menacingly.

[Aeron]: “From your lack of response, I can only assume you’re wondering why I’m able to keep my eyes shut so long. You see, the answer to that is-”

Aeron was interrupted by the phantom slapping him across the face, sending him falling to the ground. He shot it a hard glare.

[Aeron]: “Hey, what was tha-” (Realizes his eyes are open) “...shit.”

The phantom moved to lunge, but was unexpectedly unable to move up or down, shooting through the air above Aeron like a rather miffed bullet of demonic retribution. Aeron got up and turned to find a black and blue bug-like alien mostly covered in a large shell approaching him.

[???]: “In hindsight, I probably should’ve let him take care of you for me.”

[Aeron]: “Wow, rude. Lemme guess, new alien?”

[???]: “Another one of Nullamor’s. I call this one CryoShell.”

[Aeron]: “Eh, I woulda gone more for ‘Cryos-Hell’ myself.”

[CryoShell]: “That’s because you’re way too edgy for your own good. You’re a stealth-based serial killer dressed in glaring white for fuck’s sake.”

[Aeron]: “Screw off. Also, dodge.”

[CryoShell]: “Dodge?”

CryoShell was interrupted by the phantom lunging at him, knocking him back a few meters. He closed the shell around his eye, and though the phantom was incredibly strong, his shell was able to keep it at bay.

[CryoShell]: “Woah there, Nelly!”

He grabbed at the phantom with his claws, using beams of cryogenic energy to freeze it in place for a few moments. He took the opportunity to detransform and put some quick distance between them, closing his eyes as soon as he turned back to face the phantom. After a few moments, the phantom broke out of the ice, appearing impressively peeved for having a completely emotionless face. Theo heard the shattering of the ice, but his only response was to smirk.

[Aeron]: “What the hell are you doing?”

[Theo]: “Ten seconds.”

[Aeron]: “Excuse me?”

[Theo]: “From the time that phantom rushes me to the time I have you both down for the count, it’ll have been ten seconds.”

Aeron laughed.

[Aeron]: “What, are you trying that ‘Ten-Second Technique’ again? Do you seriously think that’s gonna work?”

[Theo]: “Try me.”

The phantom slowly drifted across the area, carefully observing Theo. After a few tense seconds, Theo suddenly opened his eyes, prompting the phantom to rush him. As it appeared in front of him almost instantly, it froze up, noticing that Theo’s eyes were glazed over. Theo, taking notice of the phantom’s presence, immediately pulled up the StarTrix and transformed into a gold and silver bell-like alien that hovered into the air.

[Theo/???]: “Bronzoon! Seven seconds left!”

Bronzoon opened his eye, prompting the phantom to rush him again. As soon as it re-materialized, Bronzoon created an ear-piercing barrage of sound waves that ripped through the phantom’s incorporeal form, directly striking the music box Aeron was holding. The impact of the sound waves threw it into the air, smashing it into Aeron’s face and knocking him out. The music box was flung open by the impact, and began playing its haunting melody.

Bronzoon’s sound waves almost immediately synchronized with the music box’s tune, creating a resonance force that ripped the music box apart atom by atom, practically disintegrating it. As the music box fell apart, the phantom seemed to be falling apart with it, eventually fading away into nothingness as the box was fully destroyed. The lone, eyeless figurine mounted inside the music box was the only thing that remained, dropping to the ground with a quiet thud.

Satisfied with the destruction of the box, Bronzoon transformed back into Theo, who summoned Magidisk as a Projection Transformation. Magidisk walked over to a nearby bush and fished out an Aspect Disc, placing it inside Theo. He blinked a few times, his vision being restored, and recalled Magidisk. Meanwhile, Aeron had woken back up, rubbing his head for a couple moments before noticing him.

[Aeron]: “Okay, what the hell?”

[Theo]: “I’ve been following you as Smooth Criminal for a while, and I was in the area when I heard you talk about how the phantom worked. All I had to do was use Magidisk to remove my sight and store it away as an Aspect Disc, and I was good to go.”

[Aeron]: “Huh. Well, I’d love to stay and chat, but I’ve got things to-CLOCKWORK!”

Clockwork swiftly formed from the InverTrix and grabbed Aeron, dragging him off into another timeline before Theo could react.

[Theo]: “God dammit!” (Throws his hands up in the air) “Why do I let him get away with talking so much?!”

[Cut to Theo back in Plumber Base UT1, as Alpha is running a diagnostic on the small eyeless figurine, which Theo brought back with him. Nova’s team is resting nearby, discussing the recent attack.]

[Alpha]: (Turns to Theo) “Traces of spiritual energy on this figurine you retrieved indicate that some damn fool likely came across the box of a deceased Daemonian and converted it into some sort of music box. It would take impressive skill to do that, admittedly, but that is an incredibly stupid idea.”

[Theo]: “Daemonian? You mean like dad’s Spiritualist?”

[Alpha]: “Right. Any spirits they capture are trapped in their boxes when they pass away, but all it takes is one person that doesn’t know what they’re doing to release them.”

[Theo]: “Okay. I’m just glad I can teleport to practically exactly when Aeron arrives in a timeline, because he is stupidly hard to catch.”

[Nova]: “You wanna talk hard to catch, try catching people that teleport away out of nowhere! No overpowered time aliens or anything!”

[Theo]: “Yeah, how are guys doing after all that, anyways?”

[Herc]: “We got out fine, but we probably need more training and some sort of faster transportation if we want to be effective at defending anything except for ourselves.”

[Alpha]: “Unfortunately, all we have on-base at the moment is the Battle Moped, and that’s just a two-seater.”

[F3]: “...I have a minivan we could use.”

[Nova]: “Are you kidding me?! I just got used to the stupid Battle Moped! We are not using a minivan!”

[Alpha]: “Actually, if you bring it in tomorrow, I might be able to convert it into a Plumber-standard vehicle, like I did with the moped.”

There were a few moments of awkward silence.

[Nova]: (Slumps over with a defeated expression) “You’ve gotta be kidding me.”