The Cave

The Cave is the third episode of the first season of Remember Celestial?

Episode
The Cave was truly amazing. An entire mountain. And only Oleo lived there. It was truly amazing. He had two separate boy’s and girl’s dorms, a gigantic TV screen like at a baseball game, work out stuff, a garage with a spaceship in it, a kitchen, an overhead speaker system, a bunch of couches and beanbags, and a state-of-the-art security system. I was too busy taking in my surroundings to listen to the junk Leo- or Oleo, whatever- was jabbering about. He held my Null Void projector like it was the most precious thing in the world. I sat down on a couch, eyes wide. I turned my head at Oleo, to see aiming the projector at a bowl of cereal.

“Leo!” I yelled, as he pressed in on the trigger.

A giant yellow portal was created from the projector. The bowl of cereal disappeared, but three slobbering, grunting, howling, no-eyed, orange beasts jumped out of the portal before Oleo could stop projecting the portal.

“Crap,” I muttered.

One of the giant dogs, obviously the leader, pounced at the first thing he saw (sensed?)- Oleo. Oleo jumped out of the way, but his ID mask fell off, revealing his ugly bug form. Oleo flew up towards the roof.

“Vulpimancers,” he croaked.

Now, Bellum was telling me to blow up the dogs with the packs of C-4 in my pockets. Bellum, who was inside my body, should’ve known that I have never even seen a pack of C-4 in person in my entire life.

Pacis was telling me to let the dogs roam free. ‘And feast on the city’ I added on.

Deficio was telling me to strangle the dogs with my bare hands. I can’t believe how much Deficio does not know about the limits of the human body.

“You’re not human,” Deficio reminded me. Gee, thanks, Deficio.

Prosperitas was telling me to just give up, because I am an idiotic failure. That really boosted my self esteem.

Councillium just sighed.

I decided none of those strategies were reasonable and that I had to improvise.

I got up and looked around. I couldn’t see the dogs. Oleo fluttered down beside me.

“They went that-a way,” he pointed at the front door, which had been ripped out.

I looked at him.

He shrugged, “they’re Vulpimancers.”

“Yeah…” I have a lot of bad luck with questions (“Remember Celestial” and what not).

We ran out the smashed door. I looked down the side of the mountain at the city. Women screamed. Children sobbed. Lampposts flew. Roads got destroyed. In other words, Oleo had released a pack of angry alien dogs that were destroying the city.

And it started raining.

“Great,” I managed.

Oleo shrugged. He launched himself from off the ground, grabbed my shoulders, and flew us into the city. Right as we landed, the Vulpimancers seemed to recognize us and surrounded us. They started walking around us in a circle, like vultures, but it didn’t have the same effect as vultures, mainly because they were soaking wet, eyeless dogs that were orange.

An electric charge flew through me. My ID mask got fried and it fell to the ground. A Vulpimancer was surprised by my sudden change from regular citizen to stupid-looking half-Celestialsapien and pounced on me. A giant piece of wood materialized in my hand and I hit the smelly mutt with some sort of enhanced strength and Slobbering Baddie Number One went flying.

I looked at piece of wood and realized that it was actually a gigantic Popsicle stick. It even had the joke and everything.

''What do you get when you mix a pit bull and a border collie?

A dog that rips out your arm and the runs to get help.''

I doubted that the dogs I were dealing would run for help after they ripped out my arm.

“L- Oleo, hand me the Null Void Projector,” I whispered.

“I left it at the Cave,” he murmured back.

“Then go get it,” I muttered.

Oleo lifted off the ground and flew away. That was encouraging. Now it was me vs. three angry dogs with bad hygiene. I held up the stick like a baseball bat and yelled, “Want some?” Apparently, they did want some and all three leaped on me. I swung the Popsicle stick at the three Vulpimancers. A paw connected with the wooden plank and it went flying. The alpha male’s paws landed on my chest and squeezed the air out of me. To add insult to injury, one of the mutts chased my club, rolled onto its back and started chewing it like the fate of the world counted on it. The voices pounded in my head. My hands became aglow with blue energy. I blasted a hurricane of pure raging power into the Vulpimancer’s head. It went flying. The other dogs stopped what they were doing and whimpered. I shot them too. Oleo flew down with the Null Void projector and zapped them, sending them back to whatever pocket universe they belonged in. “Nice job,” Oleo said. I stayed quiet. “What? Aren’t you going to congratulate me for getting rid of the Vulpimancers?” Oleo asked. I turned around, “Yeah, right. You were the one that released them in the first place.” Oleo sighed and we flew back up to the cave.