My Big Fat Alien Wedding

My Big Fat Alien Wedding is the 39th Tomas 10 episode.

Plot
My Big Fat Alien Wedding

It was a nice warm day. We were in the RV trying on our tuxedos for the wedding of Joe and Camille. Later that day we went to see where the ceremony would take place. There we met Fer’s friend Joe. “Fer.” he said.

“Joe, and this must be Camille. Congratulations.” he said.

“Fer, I’m so glad you are here. Maybe you can talk some sense into my parents.” he said.

“Why what’s the problem?” Fer asked.

“Fer.” Gordon called.

“Gordon, Betty.” he said.

“We’re so glad you’re here. Maybe you can talk some sense into these kids.” he said.

“What’s going on?” Fer asked.

“They don’t know what they’re doing. The whole wedding is a terrible mistake.” Gordon replied.

“The whole wedding is a terrible mistake?” Fer asked.

“See listen to Fer.” Gordon said to Joe. Santi and I looked at each other.

“Now Gordon, the kids are grown up. Who are we to get in the way.” We heard someone say.

“These are my parents.” Camille said. “Mr. and Mrs. Mann”

“I’m so sorry we had to meet in such awkward circumstances.” Mrs. Mann said.

“So do we.” Gordon and Betty said together. Then they left.

“Uh, Fer this has been a nightmare. Not just the family, but the wedding dress got lost, the photographers camera got smashed, the flowers have died, everything’s gone wrong.” Joe said.

“Don’t worry, I’m sure it’ll all work out.” Fer comforted.

That night I was heading down to the lake, when I walked by the food truck. I noticed the food and saw that the baker had just taken some inside. When the baker came back he saw that I was eating some of the desserts.

“It’s ok.” I said. “I’m the official food taster guy, yeah that works.” I said. “Keep up the good work.” I said as I left. The baker just ignored me and continued unloading the truck. Suddenly something came up behind him and knocked him out. He was then dragged behind the trees and bushes.

A few seconds later he came out again and said “Now to deliver a wedding they’ll never forget.” he said evilly. However the real baker was still knocked out behind the trees and bushes.

When I arrived at the lake, I saw a sign that read: No Swimming. “No swimming. Now what am I supposed to do for fun?” I wondered.

Just then I heard a car horn. I turned around to see the delivery truck heading straight for the wedding. I quickly activated the watch and transformed into the first alien I saw: Danger Duck.

Next I quacked in front of it and braced for impact. When it was about to hit I quacked out and left behind a giant egg. As soon as the truck hit it exploded.

I reappeared when it was destroyed and celebrated. “Oh yeah, it’s scary being this good.” I said. But then I noticed the wedding chairs were caught on fire. “Uh oh” I said.

I created an egg “Please be a water egg.” I said then threw it at one chair. It turned into milk and put out the fire. “Milk works too.” I said then created another one and threw it at a different chair. Unfortunately that one exploded. “Not good.” I said. Then I attempted another. “Please be a water egg, please be a water egg.” I said and threw it at another. However the fire intensified. “Or oil.” I said nervously.

The fire was getting stronger. I had to do something before it got out of control. “This isn’t working.” I said. “I need water. Lots and lots of…” I started then turned around and noticed the lake, getting an idea. “water.” I finished.

Next I leaped high into the air and dove into the water. “Aqua Dense!” I shouted as I dove in. A few seconds later a large amount of water was sent into the air. It poured down like rain, putting out the fire.

Next as I was about to get out, two rifles were being pointed at me. “Freeze!” the person said.

“Wow, the lifeguards around here are really strict.” I said.

“An Anatra Mec!” he said stating Danger Duck’s species. The people were shown to be Gordon and Betty.

Then Fer and Santi showed up, along with Joe and the Mann family. “What’s going on?” Fer asked.

“This alien was trying to ruin the wedding.” Betty said.

“I was trying to save the wedding.” I corrected.

“Uh, it seems he’s telling the truth.” Fer said.

“Still, better not take the chance. You know aliens, can’t trust any of them.” Betty replied.

“Yeah, can’t trust any of them. Now I better be on my way.” I said then quacked out.

“It’s getting away, blast it!” Gordon shouted. Then the two of them started blasting in all directions until they were stopped by Joe.

“Put those things down.” he said. “This is a wedding not a shooting range.”

“But that thing is still out there.” Gordon replied.

“Whatever it was, it’s all over now.” Mrs. Mann said.

Meanwhile, Danger Duck was hiding behind the bushes across the lake watching them.

The next day we were in the RV. “I guess I should have told you that the groom’s parents are alien hunters.” Fer started. “And the bride and her family are aliens.”

“Aliens?” Santi asked. “They don’t look like aliens.” he said.

“That is because they’re just in disguise for the wedding. In fact they are one of the toughest and meanest aliens in the galaxy. They call them Sludgepuppies. The Hunters and the Sludges have been at it for decades, constantly at war. Until now.” Fer said.

“How do you know that?” I asked.

Gordon told me. At first I thought it was just a story, but after what we’ve been through, he must have been telling the truth.” he replied.

Later that day we were at a fancy restaurant during the rehearsal dinner. Mr. and Mrs. Mann were being friendly but, Gordon and Betty knew it was an act. Then we heard people screaming and running away. We looked to see what it was and we saw a large mud alien.

He was smashing the tables andtossing them around. “That must be the thing attacked me last night.” I said then hid under the table.

“Camille, I will not allow you to marry this filthy meat puppet.” he said.

“It’s my ex-boyfriend.” She said. “How did he find out about the wedding?” She wondered.

Then her ex-boyfriend grabbed Joe and lifted him to his face. “No meat puppet, any last words before I crush you?” He said. Then his arm was cut off, by a large swirling spike, causing Joe to fall out of his grasp. The ex-boyfriend looked to see where it came from and saw Spykeback. “A Pointe Sapien.” he said Spykeback’s species. “What are you doing here?” he asked.

“Um, I’m a friend of the groom.” I replied.

“Then you’re no friend of mine.” he said then shot mud at me. I jumped to the side and shot three spikes at him. The spikes went into his chest. It seemed that they had no affect. He plucked them out as if it never happened.

After that he made one of his arms into a club and slammed me to a table. Then it lifted me up and threw me against the wall. Then hit me through the wall into the next room, the spa. He followed me in. I got ready to take him, but I didn’t see him.

Then from behind he wrapped his arm around me and pulled me into him. AS he drew me in I landed a punch right on his head. We both them fell into the hot tub. In there we continued to tussle, and then he dissolved and the whole hot tub turned to mud.

After that I got out all dirty. “Yuck.” I said.

Santi and Fer came running after me. “It was a dirty job.” Fer said “But somebody had to do it.”

Later we went outside. “We are not canceling our wedding.” Camille said.

“Civilians will be at the wedding tomorrow. What if there is another attack.” Gordon said.

“At least let us bring our gear.” Betty said.

“No. No weapons.” Joe replied.

Everyone relax, there is no need for weapons, it’s all over now.” Mrs. Mann said.

The next day we were at the wedding. It was being held at 3:00 p.m. “If any has any reason why these two should not be married, let them speak now or forever…” the priest said but was then hit in the face with a pile of mud.

“Yeah, we have something to say.” Mr. Mann said. His arm had turned into mud. Next their butler shot mud at Gordon and Betty. Trapping them in a pile of mud with just their heads sticking out. “This wedding, and everyone in it, is about to be cancelled.” he said.

“Mom, dad, you can’t do this.” Camille protested.

“Stay out of this Camille, this is for your own good.” Mrs. Mann said. Then pushed her aside. Next Mr. Mann grabbed Joe and lifted him up high and squeezed him.

“It was her mom and dad behind all the tricks all along.” I said.

“What did I tell you? Once a sludge always a sludge.” Betty said.

“They up the ex-boyfriend to keep suspicion off themselves.” Fer said.

“But, I thought you said you liked me.” he said suffering.

“We lied.” Mr. Mann replied.

Then all of a sudden something hit the middle of his arm. It exploded and it fell off. Mr. and Mrs. Mann looked to find Upchuck and the groom falling behind me.

“Another wedding crasher!” Mrs. Mann said.

“And this one is a Gourmand.” Mr. Mann said.

“I’m not going to et you ruin this wedding.” I said to them.

“Very well, but we’re level two.” Mr. Mann said. “Let’s see you get past level one.” he said. Then the butler changed both his arms into their mud form and charged at me. He made one arm into a club and swung at Upchuck.

I dodged and backed off. He continued after me, swinging his club. I kept dodging. Then he slammed his club on the ground and I jumped on top of it. However, he lifted it up and tossed me into the air. As I came down he swung his club and slammed me.

The hit knocked me down. My eyes had closed from the pain. Then when I opened my eyes, I saw a giant mace coming down on top of me. I quickly rolled to the side, away from harm.

“I need to eat something fast.” I said as I got up. Then he changed his club and mace, into giant fists with both his hands. He charged at me again and I charged at him. I leaped into the air, opened my mouth, and went to take a bite out of his head.

Unfortunately he punched me out of the way. “I should have seen that coming.” I said to myself, then I got an idea. “Hey manure man!” I called out to him. “Hit me with your best shot!” I challenged. He retracted his giant fists and got in a baseball pitcher stance. Then he swung his arm, releasing at mud ball.

When it came, I opened my mouth, swallowed it, and rolled back. “Yes!” I said. Then he got ready to do it again, so I fired two spitballs. One exploded on his arm before he could throw the mud and the other hit his face. “Ha ha.” I said.

Then I saw that the blast left the butler with half his face. He looked at me angry and fixed his other half, by adding more mud to it. It was as if nothing ever happened. The butler was fine.

Next he made each of his hands into a mace. Then he ran at me again. I charged back. But he had tricked me. I thought he was going for a direct attack, but instead he jumped behind me and as I turned around he shot me with a large amount of mud. The mud chased me to stick to a near by tree.

“You’re going to have to do better than that.” I said. Next, I slurped up all the mud, making me fatter and giving me more spitballs. That made the butler even more angry. He created two extra arms and turned all four into a large maces. I charged at him blasting spitballs, while he would swing around his maces. I did my best dodging them. Then one came right at me. I jumped over it as it hit the ground and realized there was one right behind it. Unable to dodge I fired another spitball at it. I managed to destroy it and continued running.

When I got close enough, I jumped as high as I could right at him. As I passed over him, I turned myself upside down and bit off his entire head. “Yes!” I said as I landed. However, a few seconds later he grew it back. “No.” I said.

Then he made his club again and slammed me. The force of the hit caused me to fire another spitball, with a slight curve. That gave an idea. As I positioned myself I spun around and released a spitball. My spin shot the spitball far out missing the butler. The butler than started turning his arms into blades, when the spitball curved like a Frisbee and exploded on the back of his head. He quickly fixed his head and ran at me. In return I ran at him as well.

Meanwhile, Joe was trying to comfort Camille while she was crying. “This is my special day.” she said. “And no one is going to ruin it. Especially not my family.” she said. Then she turned her body into mud and now looked like a girl completely covered in mud. Then she ran off to help me.

Meanwhile, the butler had pinned me down and was pounding me with clubs, sending out all my spitballs. He was so focused on that, that he didn’t notice Camille run up and slam his face with a mud hammer. “Are you ok?” she asked.

“Yeah,” I replied “But I’m out of ammo.” I said. Suddenly Camille was thrown back with a long mud arm. Before I could react, I was grabbed by the butler. He lifted me up and I took a bite out of his arm. Next he sent me flying.

In midair, I managed to turn around and blast a spitball at the butler. I had one spitball left. As I flew, I released one of my tongues. It wrapped around the tree branch and sent me right back where I came from.

Camille was struggling to overpower the butler, but then she was overpower and thrown to the side. The butler noticed me as I came back and burst through his body. Then he was about to attack, when I quickly turned around and blasted my last spitball at his head.

After that Camille took over and I went to help free Gordon and Betty. I tried slurping up the mud like I did before but was reverted back before I could finish.

“Nice work, Tomas.” Fer said then he and Santi came over to help get them out.

“What do we do?” Betty asked. “Without our gear we’re defenseless.” she stated.

“Hang on.” Fer said. “You promised to leave your gear at home, we didn’t.” he said then pulled out two hand blaster guns (that we got from the Doppelt brothers) for them. And Santi took one out and gave another two me. Quickly we ran over to help Camille. We all started blasting the butler and he couldn’t take us all at once.

We kept him distracted while Camille turned her arm into a hammer and slammed the butler in the face. Then Camille tired to overpower the butler again. Fer wanted to end it now. He set the blaster to self destruct and ran at the butler.

The butler saw him coming and had had enough. He turned his body into his full mud form and tossed Camille aside. Then he punched back Fer. Luckily Fer managed to stick the blaster into his chest. Then when it exploded, it sent his body flying in all directions. That managed to finally take him down.

After a while I heard Joe in pain. I looked back to find him being swished again by Mr. Mann. I looked at my watch and was ready to go.

Mr. Mann continued squishing Joe and then his arm was once again blasted. Only this time, it was by Heatblast. “Don’t you ever learn?” Mrs. Mann asked.

“I guess not.” I said. Then I created a fireball and shot it at them. “I’m all fired up.” I said. The two had lost body parts and looked deformed.

This made them angry. They changed into their full mud forms. Then Mr. Mann turned his arm into a giant whip and whipped me across the lake. Then they both rushed over.

Next they hit me again. Mr. Mann was getting ready to strike again. But I dodged. Then he tried again, I also dodged. Next I blasted him with fire.

While I was firing Mrs. Mann extended her arm. She grabbed hold of Heatblast and hit me against the tree. Then she made a club with spikes. She was about to swing it at me. My only choice was to release all my heat. “Bringin the heat.” I said as Mrs. Mann had to look away from the light.

The heat hardened the mud into rock and I was able to break free. “Irritating pest.” She said as she broke off hr rock arm and replaced it with mud. All of a sudden the ground started rising. Quickly I blasted the ground to get away, just as Mr. Mann broke through and tried to grab me.

“We’ll teach you to muck up our family business.” He said. Then Mr. and Mrs. Mann merged into one being. It was a twice their original size with their heads n top.

The Sludges shot out a giant arm and captured me. “You’ve been a bad little alien!” Mrs. Mann said. Then they pulled me into their body “We’re putting you down for a nap. A dirt nap!” she said and then engulfed me. They thought they had won and started laughing, but then their insides boiled as Heatblast fired up. They started to dry up from the inside out. Until they completely hardened into rock. I as Heatblast exploded from the charred remains, and the two Sludges were just a dried up statue.

After that Joe and Camille finally got married, which put an end to the decades long feud. “This wedding could not have been better.” I said.

The End

Characters

 * Tomas Maggi
 * Fer Maggi
 * Santi Diaz
 * Joe
 * Camielle
 * Gordan
 * Betty Jean

Villians

 * Mr. and Mrs. Mann
 * Sludge butler

Aliens used

 * Danger Duck
 * Spykeback
 * Upchuck
 * Heatblast