GIR: Reactivated

This movie takes place in Dimension 0 on Earth-68.

Story
Meteor pigs fall upon Galvan Prime 2, all of them squealing as they are set on fire. They crash into the ground, exploding into bacon all over the planet. The Galvan scream, as the bacon sticks to them, burning their skin. Several of them start eating it, addicted to it, while they scream with smoke coming out of their mouths.

Derrick J. Wyatt: Ah! It burns us! Nasty baconses! But it’s so scrumptious!

Azmuth and Luhley are watching from Azumuth’s tower, the bacon beginning to dissolve the outer portion of the tower.

Luhley: What do we do, First Thinker Azmuth?! We are powerless against the power of bacon! It’s so good, it melts us! And they can’t stop eating it!

Azmuth: I hate to say it, but it seems like we have pull out Droid 0 from storage.

Luhley: Not Droid 0! The last time we pulled him out, it destroyed the first Galvan Prime! We had to relocate everyone onto Prime 2!

Azmuth: It is our only machine that is immune to the acidity of the grease that thing releases. If we don’t do it, then the planet will be destroyed.

Luhley: You do it, and the planet will be destroyed! Just, don’t give him the Omnitrix again.

Azmuth and Luhley go to the basement, which has a large vault door. They open it, revealing a retina scanner. Azmuth does the scan, as it unlocks a fingerprint scan. Azmuth puts his hand on it, as the security door requests a cupcake. Azmuth pulls one out, placing it in a slot. A robotic hand reaches through, pulling the cupcake through.

GIR: CUPCAKE POWER!

A hole in the ceiling occurs, as GIR walks up from behind Azmuth and Luhley, holding an armful of cupcakes. He eats one obnoxiously with his mouth open, icing all over his face.

Luhley: How’d he get behind us if he went through the ceiling?!

Azmuth: Not essential. Now GIR. Are you familiar, with this?

Azmuth pulls out a pair of tongs, holding a piece of bacon. The aroma from the bacon becomes visible, as GIR’s eyes stretch out from where he’s standing, mesmerized.

GIR: Is it baby goat? Baby goats are so cute! Especially when they breathe fire and have poisonous breath!

Luhley: Uh, isn’t that a chimera?

Azmuth: It is toxic to us, but not to you. I want you to go around and eat all of these that are currently on the planet. Don’t let anything stop you. Take it from those trying to eat it, horde it all for yourself.

GIR: Okey dokey!

GIR comes over, clenching his mouth around the bacon and tongs, eating them both. The tongs stick out through his stomach, having an indent.

Luhley: But Azmuth! No one will want this thing going around the planet! They remembered what happened last time!

Azmuth: Oh, Luhley. When will you learn? I always have a contingency plan figured out for exactly these kinds of situations.

GIR zippers up a green dog costume, having a square head hood, zipper in the front with bulging eyes, and looks highly unrealistic.

Luhley: This is your contingency plan?

Azmuth: I had planned on it being more intimidating. But I left Blukic and Driba to actually make the costume.

Luhley: Oh! This is actually good handiwork for them then.

GIR: Time to eat some enchiladas!

GIR runs off, his suit squeaking with each step.

Luhley: No! You need to eat the bacon! Oh, will we survive this day?

The Galvans run and fly on jetpacks in terror, as GIR lunges at everyone, trying to rip the bacon from their hands. Driba, partially disintegrated, does a tug-of-war against GIR for the bacon.

Driba: This is mine! I found it first!

GIR opens his mouth and eats the bacon and Driba, his screams muffled and hollowed out from the metal body. GIR uses his feet jets to fly around, swiping up all the bacon he can muster.

Driba: (In GIR’s stomach) Ah! Oh, wow! So much bacon! Ah! It burns!

A half moon shaped ship flies down, it having a glass window on the rounded side, and an extension for an engine on the opened side. The Sprittle Runner flies down, crashing through buildings as it comes to GIR swimming in bacon in a cratered hole created by the bacon. Driving the Sprittle Runner is Dr. Psychobos.

Psychobos: S-s-s-success! I, Dr. Psychobos, the g-g-g-reatest mind in the universe, and I use the term loosely, have j-j-just forced Azmuth to release his beast with the Omnitrix!

The Sprittle Runner fires a tractor beam, picking up the bacon pool, which is shrinking at an alarming rate. GIR is eating as he’s swimming, as the Sprittle Runner retreats back to the sky. Azmuth does a face palm, as Luhley sighs.

Luhley: Well, that couldn’t have gone any worse.

Azmuth: All citizens, make it into the underground bunkers! And stop eating the bacon, for crying out loud! Luhley, form a team of whoever’s not disintegrated or injured and rescue GIR.

Luhley: Are you serious?! Ugh! Fine! I need volunteers!

Blukic: I’ll go!

Luhley turns to Blukic, who is inside a plastic bubble, completely unharmed.

Luhley: Why aren’t you hurt?

Blukic: I got sick so I went into quarantine inside this bubble. I was going for my daily walk acting like the Galvanic Mechamorph’s soccer ball when it started raining.

Luhley: The Mechamorphs! Where are they?!

Blukic: A puddle on the ground. They didn’t react too well to the bacon grease either. Anyway, when the bacon hit the bubble, nothing happened! I think I discovered an anti-bacon weapon!

Luhley: This is what I get? Alright! The mission is to rescue GIR!

Blukic: Okay! End Scene

Orbiting around Galvan Prime II is Dr. Psychobos’ spaceship, the U.F.O. stuck in an asteroid. The ship is firing the pigs from cannons, them burning up as they enter the atmosphere. Inside, Khyber sits, depressed looking, as he whistles unenthusiastically to command the pigs to climb into the cannons, as Malware fires them off.

Khyber: You know, when I joined the Faction, I didn’t intend on being a pig farmer.

Malware: And I didn’t intend to work with such insignificant beings, or use such a pathetic plot to destroy Azmuth and get the Omnitrix! But, whatever works.

Dr. Psychobos joins with the two of them, using his lightning to levitate GIR and the bacon, him eating it.

Malware: Where’s the robot?! You promised me that you would bring the robot that the Omnitrix was bonded to!

Psychobos: I did, you lit-t-t-eral visioned cretin! This is the r-r-r-obot, wearing a d-d-dog costume.

Khyber: So, that isn’t a dog?

Psychobos: (Sighs in anxiety) Why do I have to work with s-s-such imb-b-beciles?

Psychobos uses his lightning to undo the zipper, flinging the dog costume across the room to reveal GIR. Malware’s expression is exasperated.

Malware: Where, is, THE OMNITRIX?!

Psychobos: Huh?

Psychobos brings GIR in, seeing that the Omnitrix is not on him.

Psychobos: No! Where is it, you pile of bolts?!

GIR: Aw, you’re so sweet! I think somebody needs a hug!

GIR reaches to hug Psychobos, as he pushes him away. Psychobos uses his lightning to open GIR’s head, it being filled with bacon wrapped cupcakes.

GIR: Hey! If you want to share, I can always make some more! But this batch is my precious!

Psychobos closes his head, as he opens his stomach. Bacon cascades out like a waterfall, as a shriveled up Driba lays on top of the pile, steaming.

Driba: (Hoarsely) The horror. The horror.

Malware: There is no Omnitrix! You failed me, Psychobos!

Psychobos: Nonsense. We simply c-c-change our tactics. K-k-khyber! Grab the Nemetrix. And stop the onslaught, and I use the term loosely, on Galvan Prime.

Khyber: Yeah, yeah.

Khyber gets up and starts walking, whistling blandly. The pigs stop on his command, all oinking and watching him.

GIR: Hey! I like that sound!

GIR whistles as well, as the pigs all turn their attention to him.

Khyber: You could hear my whistle?

Khyber whistles, as GIR whistles back. The two engage in a whistling conversation, which eventually turns into whistling the “Doom Song.” Psychobos and Malware are infuriated, as Dr. Psychobos does a crab shuffle towards the table.

Psychobos: I have to d-d-do everything around here.

Dr. Psychobos grabs the Nemetrix off the counter, as he comes back over. GIR and Khyber are whistling in harmony, as the pigs all dance accordingly. One pig stands up on its hind legs, snorting at GIR.

GIR: I like you. I’m going to name you Zim. Or, maybe Dib. Yeah! I’m going to name you Dib!

Psychobos: Enough!

Dr. Psychobos attaches the Nemetrix to GIR’s chest, as it releases red feedback energy.

Psychobos: Now, Khyber! Control it with your whistle!

Khyber: Do I have to? I’m starting to like this guy.

Malware: Do it!

Khyber groans, as he whistles. GIR transforms into Muck Rock, being freed from Psychobos’ lightning prison and dropping to the ground. Muck Rock has cyan eyes.

Psychobos: Success! We have turned Azmuth’s secret weapon into our mindless servant! The Nemetrix’s f-f-feral nature will erase any brain that he had, and I use the term loosely, and make him a snarling beast!

Muck Rock sniffs the air, as it looks over at the shriveled up Driba lying on top of a pile of bacon. Muck Rock spits a stream of water, washing Driba away, revitalizing his skin and returning him to normal. Muck Rock then walks over, and eats the bacon.

Psychobos: Make it stop! Make it stop!

Khyber whistles, as Muck Rock looks up, wagging his tail. He then spots his wagging tail, snapping at it. Muck Rock then runs in a circle, chasing his tail.

Psychobos: What is he doing?! What is he doing?!

Dib the pig walks over to Driba, sniffing him. Driba gets up, distorted.

Driba: Huh? What? Ah!

Driba sees Dr. Psychobos shooting lightning at Muck Rock, it being immune. Khyber tries to settle Muck Rock down, as Driba hides behind Dib.

Driba: How’d I get into this?!

Muck Rock spits water, washing Malware back and bathing Psychobos. Psychobos’ lightning shocks him, as he falls back.

Psychobos: Khyber!

Khyber whistles, as Muck Rock transforms into Sand Ripper, lying on the ground. He lets out a whale call moan, as he starts flailing around like a fish out of water.

Psychobos: Alright. Now. How do we get control of this thing?

Malware: Isn’t it obvious? You revert him, and then I’ll absorb him. This will destroy him and give us the advantage against Azmuth!

Psychobos: It does seem to be the better option, considering that this thing is an uncontrollable monstrosity. Khyber, revert it.

Khyber whistles, as Sand Ripper reverts. Khyber reaches forward, swiping the Nemetrix from him, as Psychobos catches him in lightning.

GIR: Aw, you gave me a lightning pillow.

Psychobos: It’s mind is still the same?! Inconceivable!

Khyber: Are you sure that means what you think it means?

Psychobos: Of course I do!

Malware: Now, stand back.

Malware walks over towards GIR, positioning himself underneath him.

GIR: You want a hug? Yay! Come to papa!

Psychobos drops GIR, as Malware grabs GIR, him breaking down as he’s absorbed into Malware. Malware howls in pain as his body releases red energy streams, as his body takes on the form of GIR. He features Malware’s claws, and one eye, though it features a GIR style eye.

Malware/GIR: (Deeper serious GIR voice) Now that I possess this robot body, I can ravage the entirety of Galvan Prime!

Driba: Charge!

Driba shouts a battle cry, as he rides Dib the pig forward. It goes to tackle Khyber, as he sidesteps out of the way. Dib crashes into the table, rocking it and flinging the Nemetrix into the air. It lands on Malware, it merging to him, releasing feedback. Malware screams, as morphs his form, becoming an enlarged TKV. The cell enters mitosis, splitting into two cells. The second cell  begins to split again, as Dr. Psychobos shoots lightning at it, frying and killing it, causing it to break apart. GIR sits up out of it, smacking his lips.

GIR: What’s for breakfast?

Khyber: That’s the robot? Then that means!

Khyber whistles, as the other TKV reverts into the Malware/GIR hybrid. The Nemetrix is now integrated into its body.

Psychobos: Malware?

Malware/GIR: Malware is dead! I have become something stronger, become something more! I am no longer Malware, and I am not a SIR unit. You can call me, Redman.

Psychobos: Redman?

Redman: And now, I shall become the only SIR unit that can utilize an Omnitrix like device!

Redman transforms into Terroranchula, hissing at the group. It spits force field webs at Psychobos and Khyber, pinning them to the wall. Terroranchula walks over to GIR, standing over him.

GIR: AH! AH! AH, AH, AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

Dib runs over, bumping GIR and flipping him onto its back, landing behind Driba.

Driba: Hold on, GIR!

Dib runs to the cannon loading tube, running into it. Khyber draws his knife, tossing it and hitting the launch button, firing the cannon to fire them out. Terroranchula turns to Khyber, hissing angrily at him.

Khyber: Well? Your prey is escaping.

Terroranchula gets right in Khyber’s face, staring him down. End Scene

GIR and Driba ride Dib the meteor pig as they enter the atmosphere, the air around them forming a flaming aura, beginning to burn them. Driba screams in terror, while GIR screams in excitement like an amusement park ride.

GIR: Faster! Faster! Add a loop-de-loop!

Driba: Slower! Slower! We’re going to die!

Luhley and Blukic, wielding jet thrusters on plastic bubbles, fly up and bump them, stopping Dib’s momentum. GIR and Driba shoot off, as Luhley flies down, catching them in her plastic bubble.

Driba: Luhley! How’d you know I needed saving?

Luhley: Uh, I didn’t. We came to rescue GIR.

Driba: Him?!

Blukic: Hey, that tickles!

Dib is in the cage with Blukic, it licking him.

Luhley: That’s not hurting?

Blukic: Nah, it’s just generic saliva in this little guy’s mouth.

Luhley: Let’s get it back to Azmuth then! Maybe he can use it to reverse engineer the effects of this nightmare!

On the ground, Azmuth looks at a hair off Dib’s chinny chin chin under a microscope, as well as the grease of the bacon on a slide.

Azmuth: Incredible. These are genetically altered pigs, designed to be able to flow through a state of a living, breathing creature resembling an Earth pig, and the cured, salted, brined and dried bacon form with high concentrations of toxic grease!

GIR: Bacon is better dipped in ketchup.

Azmuth turns, seeing GIR dipping his bacon cupcake in ketchup. He eats it, as Azmuth sighs.

Azmuth: The point is, all this bacon can revert back into these pigs, which can spontaneously create their own heat source and erupt into bacon. This can be controlled by a certain sound frequency.

Driba: The Zaroffian on the ship could control them!

Luhley: But you left him on said ship!

Blukic: Isn’t the Zaroffian DNA unlocked in the Omnitrix?

Azmuth: (Sighs) Sadly, it is.

Luhley: Azmuth! You’re not actually considering,

Azmuth: I’m no longer considering.

Azmuth pulls out the Omnitrix, as he touches it to GIR’s stomach. It attaches itself to him, as GIR inspects it while it turns cyan.

GIR: Hey! My championship eating competition belt! I missed you!

Azmuth: Now, GIR. I need you to listen very very, very very very, very very very very closely.

GIR slurps on ketchup, then stops.

GIR: What?

Azmuth: Why do I bother?

Driba: GIR! Save the piggies!

GIR: Piggies?

Blukic: The bacon turns into pigs! They were turned into weapons by mean people!

GIR: (Serious) Mean people?

GIR’s eyes turn red, as he enters battle mode. GIR slaps down the now red Omnitrix, transforming into Green Skull.

Green Skull: They’ve declared war.

Green Skull releases his ultrasonic whistle, it echoing all throughout the city. All of the bacon on the planet starts crawling along the ground, crunching up and extending out to move all together, swarming behind Green Skull. The bacon pile up and reform into pigs, them oinking and squealing in confusion. Green Skull whistles again, as the pigs all stand at attention.

Psychobos’ air ship descends through the atmosphere, coming down towards the planet.

Green Skull: Listen up, soldiers! We shall ground that piece of molasses, and free your brethren!

The pigs squeal in determination, as Green Skull whistles. The pigs light on fire, as they shoot into the sky like rockets, flying at the air ship. They crash into the asteroid part of the ship, destroying it and causing it to drop from the sky, going to crash down in the marshes outside the city.

Redman as Hypnotick flies through the army of rocket pigs, phasing through them as he snarls, approaching the ground. Hypnotick comes to the ground, and releases a red mist, mesmerizing Blukic, Driba, Luhley and Azmuth in an illusion, leaving Green Skull unharmed.

Redman: NO! How are you immune to this?! It causes you to see whatever you want most!

Green Skull: That’s because I have what I wanted most. A pig army!

Hypnotick roars at Green Skull, as he transforms into Buglizard, going to pounce at him. Green Skull catches the airborne Buglizard, tossing it aside. Green Skull reverts, as GIR slaps down the Omnitrix, becoming Eye Guy.

Eye Guy: Here we go, Redman! This is what you get for stealing the contents of my stomach!

Eye Guy fires lasers at Buglizard, which leaps back to dodge. Buglizard transforms into Skuromank, as gun turrets come out of his fur. Skuromank fires a brownish yellow liquid, as Eye Guy is hit, drenched in the liquid. The scent vapors rise up around Eye Guy, blinding his vision.

Eye Guy: Oh no! I can’t see! Wah!

Eye Guy starts crying, as a massive flood forms from his tears. The tears wash throughout the city, moisturizing and revitalizing the Galvan who were harmed by the bacon grease before. A wave of tears rushes into Skuromank, causing his tank track feet to get stuck in the dampened soil.

Redman: No, no, no! I am your natural predator! I should beat you!

Pigs fly overhead, all of them breaking down into bacon. It rains bacon on Skuromank, the grease steaming and causing his body to melt. He takes a semi-liquid form, struggling desperately to reform.

Redman: You think you’ve beaten me, GIR? This is only the beginning! I vow that one day, I will destroy!

Bacon hits Redman in the face, causing it to steam while melting. Redman eats the bacon, smacking his lips.

Redman: So, GREASY!

Redman devours the rest of the bacon around him, as it causes him to melt into a pile of goo, Azmuth collecting it into a container.

Azmuth: Well, I think that settles that.

Eye Guy reverts, as the pigs go to comfort GIR. Dib is among them, GIR hugging him.

GIR: Aw, I love you, Dib!

The Sprittle Runner shoots through the air, flying over the city.

Psychobos: You may have beat me today! But I will return!

Driba: Psychobos. The one who turned these pigs into weapons.

GIR: He did. I’m gonna get him!

GIR activates the Omnitrix, transforming into Nanomech. He flutters around, then flies after Psychobos.

Luhley: What’s that going to do to him?

Azmuth: Never underestimate small things? I honestly have no idea.

Nanomech: (Song like) La, la la, la la, la la, la la la la, la la!

Nanomech flies headfirst at the Sprittle Runner enging, flying into it. The engine explodes on the spot, as the Sprittle Runner drops from the sky, crashing and exploding with a large mushroom cloud smoke. Nanomech flies back over, reverting.

GIR: Now, there’s only one thing left to do!

Inside the remains of Psychobos’ space ship, GIR and Khyber have set up a ranch field for the pigs, as they all squeal in delight as they play around in the mud. Khyber smiles as he uses a hoe to make a track in the pit.

Khyber: To think what fun this actually is!

GIR: Whee-hoo! Ride ‘em, Dib!

GIR is cheering Dib on, who is riding on another pig. Khyber laughs at this, as the scene draws to a close.

Characters

 * GIR
 * Galvan
 * Azmuth
 * Luhley
 * Blukic
 * Driba
 * Derrick J. Wyatt

Villains

 * The Faction
 * Dr. Psychobos (death)
 * Malware (corrupted)
 * Redman
 * Khyber

By GIR with Nemetrix

 * Muck Rock
 * Sand Ripper

By Malware/Redman

 * TKV
 * Terroranchula
 * Hypnotick
 * Buglizard
 * Skuromank

By GIR with Omnitrix

 * Green Skull
 * Eye Guy
 * Nanomech

Trivia

 * Derrick’s line is based off Gollum.


 * I did a lot of research on bacon for this story, specifically the grease, what happens if water is put on it, the process of making bacon.
 * GIR fighting Galvans for bacon is based off him chasing kids to get candy on Halloween
 * The Sprittle Runner is based off an Irken cruiser. The previous GIR 10 special featured a vehicle like the Voot Cruiser, though it went unnamed.
 * Blukic’s bubble is based off “The Boy in the Plastic Bubble.”
 * Malware and Khyber not noticing GIR’s dog costume was a costume is based off no one noticing in Invader Zim about the same thing.
 * Lightning killing the TKV virus is based off the HIV virus dying outside the body at 60 degrees Celsius, with lightning being way hotter than that.
 * I had to research this as well.
 * Redman is a robot rival I created to oppose GIR in my childhood.
 * GIR using Nanomech and destroying the Sprittle Runner is based off the Happy Bee, which seemed harmless but could destroy Zim’s ship.
 * Green Skull because Green Skull originally debuted with GIR over a year ago, and I consider it to be his signature alien.
 * Eye Guy beating Skuromank, his natural predator, is a reminder that GIR is an insanely powerful fighter, and few can defeat him, even when he has the disadvantage.